Bachelor
Fun For The Whole Family

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What, No Dowries?

Commercials. We return back to the Malibu Dream House for the night of the rose ceremony. Chris greets Aaron in the deliberation room. See 'N Say Aaron explains that it's all getting real and serious and difficult and tough and hard. Did he enjoy meeting the families? He did. He says that all four women are "solid gold." I think that means he wants to see them dancing around onstage in shiny, revealing outfits. Chris invites Aaron to watch the women's private messages, shot back in their hometowns, while Chris greets the women "as they arrive." I have that in quotes because I'm sure do to the timing and editing and such, I'm sure the four women aren't all actually arriving while Aaron's watching these brief videos.

Videos. Gwen jokes about filming her video message naked on the streets of Buffalo. She didn't, because it's probably cold as hell up there. Gwen had a good time. She enjoyed visiting Niagara Falls with him. Gwen "arrives" at the Malibu Dream House, and Chris lets her in. Angela tells Aaron that she also had a great time and hopes Aaron got to know her a little better. Chris escorts her into the house. Helene shows up to the house in a slinky red dress. See, she wore it when she knew it mattered. In her video, she says the same thing everybody else said. Brooke says the same thing in her video everybody else said. Then she repeats that joke about her Marine uncle kicking Aaron's ass if he breaks her heart. See 'N Say Aaron stares at the serial-killer shrine and blathers about how tough it is to cut one of the women out tonight. Liar. He knew who he was cutting before he even went on these dates.

Commercials. When we return, Robot Chris reminds the women that this is Aaron's most difficult decision yet. Four women. Three Roses. Blah. Blah. Blah. He escorts Aaron back out to the women. Aaron says that, for the first time in his life, he's at a loss for words. Just pull the string, See 'N Say Aaron. He does so, and then repeats for the five hundredth time that he didn't expect this decision to be so difficult. He pulls the string again and repeats for the five hundredth time that he had a wonderful time with all the women and their families. He does that little bull-snort that he thinks indicates what a heavy deal this is to him, unaware that even the bachelorettes have started to make fun of him about it. I forgot to mention that dead-on impersonation of Aaron that Brooke did of him a couple of weeks ago during the end credits. Usually, I'm so relieved when an episode is over and I can go take a hot shower to get clean again that I forget to recap that part.

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