Bachelor
Matt Becomes The Victim Of A Prank

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Renegade!
"It's the most romantic season finale ever!" No, not tonight. Some other time. This episode is the most something ever. Boringest? Cougarest? Renegadiest?

L.A. Matt's visiting Shayne's parents. Lorenzo Lamas ("who I've heard is a bit of a star") first, and then Shayne's mother, since they're divorced. Shayne says Matt's been skeptical of her intentions because she's an actress.

So Shayne and Matt sit down for lunch prior to the arrival of the Lamas, where Shayne relates the horrifying story of an old boyfriend telling her father they met in a club. So they're going to ... work on their story? Does Shayne think her father is as dumb as she is? Matt certainly isn't coming across too well; he can't even get the pronunciation of Lamas right. Lima? Lomez? Lahm-Ass?

And the moment's here; Lorenzo strides in and hugs Shayne, and winks at Matt over her shoulder. This would be a terrifying wink, for me, as a person meeting my girlfriend's father the first time, even without everyone knowing that I have three other girlfriends with which I will be doing the exact same thing.

"My daughter's very important to me," explains Lorenzo in a talking head, just in case we don't know that daughters are important to fathers. "I'm here to find true love, and your daughter is an incredible human being," Matt says. Lorenzo says he was surprised to hear she was going on The Bachelor, because she's kind of a daredevil. I have no idea what that means. Then Lorenzo says what everyone knows: Shayne just wants to be on television: "I think it was the idea of being on television that was very enticing to her" are his exact words. He says that she wants to be an actress, but she wants to be a star more. Well, good job getting on the star factory that is The Bachelor, Shayne. After all, who can forget that one chick who was drunk? And the chick who did the thing and then yelled at that other chick?

Shayne says she was furious that her dad figured that out, I mean "said that" about her. "I have been fighting that comment since day one," she whines. Shayne says she's not there for any other reason than to find love. Faced with impending tears, Lorenzo says he believes that, and just wanted to know where her heart was.

L.L. asks Matt to step into the other room for a chat, where he admits to not being there as much for Shayne as he should have been. "Shayne's feelings are something you shouldn't toy with," he tells Matt. "I wouldn't screw around with her emotions," says Matt, although he admits he was skeptical of Shayne's intentions. They shake hands.

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