Bachelor
Bachelor

Episode Report Card
Daniel: F | 130 USERS: C+
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We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off

Dinner time! Sean asks Catherine where she sees them in five years: Catherine: Married, there are kids involved, happy. Sean says he can see himself married to her. Come on, you'll be lucky to be Facebook friends in five years' time.

Catherine tells us she's been thinking a lot about the fantasy suite, and how she's more traditional (than Sean, who's been holier-than-y'all this whole time?), and then she haltingly tells him (before he even brings out the Pimp Card) she originally felt that there's no way she would do that, but now she realizes that for him it's just about time together (sounds like she's been coached, because he hasn't told her that, has he?).

So they go back to the fantasy suite, where Catherine keeps up with the "I can't believe a hunk like him is attracted to me" theme, and then we learn that she got made fun of a lot. Nothing mean, or anything, just the good-natured stuff about how she was fat and ate too much. That kind of thing. So she's never spent as much time in a bathing suit as she has with Sean. "You are smokin' hot," he tells her, and then stares creepily at her for a few moments, and then they start kissing, and we are reminded again that there will be no sexytimes in the fantasy suite this season. Look, we watch this show to see things get skanked up! Why even have this show then?

Back in Los Angeles, Chris Harrison threatens us with the reunion show next week, and then awkwardly tries to make the plot of Oz the Great and Powerful sound like The Bachelor because hooray for cross-marketing!

Back at the resort, Sean having allegedly avoided the sins of the flesh, is getting dressed, by which I mean adjusting his hair strand by strand. He says he knows who he's sending home. He's got strong feelings for her and everything, but the relationship with the other women are stronger. "I never pictured myself saying goodbye to this person, so today is going to be tough," says Sean. Yep! Here we go again with "dumping a chick is tough on my" routine.

And then it's filler time, with Sean sitting down with Chris Harrison to talk about how he's reminded that it's this week when he got his heart broken by Emily. He tells Harrison this is going to be worse even that when he sent Desiree home. She's one of the sweetest women he's ever met in his whole life, he says. "It almost breaks my heart, because I hate being the person who either breaks hearts or hurt feelings, and it's just something you have to go through to reach your final goal here," he says. If I were Sean, I wouldn't tell her that she's just "something" he had to "go through."

Bachelor

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