Season 18: After the Final Rose

Episode Report Card
Lauren S: A | 37 USERS: B
I Like You a Lot

We launch right into the special with Chris basically pointing out how everyone is disgusted after watching that finale. Apparently JP has a surprise for us later but first, Chris is talking to Clare.

Clare tells Chris she's doing well, but that watching the finale brings back the sting of the day. There are a lot of silent pauses and Clare reiterates that she asked JP if he had doubts and he didn't admit to any, so she thought she was going to be getting a proposal. Chris says, "speaking of doubts…" and then asks about what was said in the helicopter. Clare reiterates how disappointed and confused she was, and finally admits that she was wearing some really quality rose-colored glasses during that last date. Chris is really so good because it's not easy to politely ask someone WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU WHY DID YOU NOT RUN, and he is able to be much more delicate but basically asks her that. She admits she should have left, but that she was trying so hard to let and keep her guard down that she trusted that JP was serious about finding love and marriage which clearly he was not. Chris asks if Clare actually wants to speak to JP here, now, but she tells him that she said exactly everything she wanted to say in St. Lucia, and it was all the closure she needed, which earns her a warm round of applause. Chris tells her it's fine, but he's going to talk to JP because it's only fair that he be able to tell his side of the story in as ineffectual and long-winded a manner as possible.

Chris then welcomes Juan Pablo, who is looking as smarmy as ever. He says that the last month has been hard for him because of the political turmoil in Venezuela. Serious political upheaval aside, JP reiterates that he wasn't on the show to play games and calls out to the other Bachelors in solidarity since they should know how hard it was for him to say goodbye to people. What he doesn't notice is the stares he gets in response, that all seem to say, "Don't drag me into this, windbag." Chris asks him the same question as last week: after watching the episode back, does he have any regrets? After a good two minutes of empty nonsense Chris jumps in to try and get him back on track and JP -- the ultimate interrupter -- actually snaps, "Can I talk?!?" It will surprise exactly no one that he can dish it out but he can't take it and awesomely, Chris just plows ahead. He asks if JP has any regrets to do with Clare and amid lots of blather the answer is basically no. Chris asks about what JP said in the helicopter and JP acts baffled and says that was a private conversation and relationship between two people. The crowd starts to grumble and Chris just moves on, but JP eventually comes back to it and asks why Clare would have regrets, shrugging and adding that he wasn't there to watch the episode with the crowd so, obviously, why would he know. I have known some people with very little self-awareness, but this guy is their king.

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