Sean is getting dressed and getting ready to meet two-dozen-odd women, all of whom will pretend tonight they're genuinely looking for love but who will later reveal they just signed up for fun and were surprised to actually fall in love. More dependable than the seasons.

Chris Harrison comes out to talk his usual bullshit about how everyone's rooting for whatever meatsack is currently starring on the current iteration of the show. Do you know anyone who watches this show non-ironically?

And Harrison introduces the women who specifically signed up to be "Mrs. Sean Lowe" (the use of Ms. anything is strictly forbidden, I imagine). There's bridal stylist Desiree, who is waiting for the person who completes her. There's "Tierra," who is a "leasing consultant," whatever that is, and she has had her heart broken twice. I assume one of those times was when she found out her parents named her "Tierra." And Harrison's lie that these women signed up specifically for Sean is exposed on the second candidate, because some off-camera interviewer tells her, and she freaks out for five minutes.

Robyn is an "oilfield account manager" from Houston who sticks out on this show because she is a) not white and b) seems to have a real job. Diana is 30 years old, which makes her practically a geezer on this show. She's from Salt Lake City and has two kids of her own, so Sean's giving her the boot in favor of some virgin womb, I bet.

Sarah is 26, from Los Angeles, an advertising designer who describes herself as "just an average girl" and she's a terrible actor, judging by the phone call filmed for biographical purposes. Oh, and she has one arm, due to a complication with the umbilical cord when she was born. I guess we're supposed to be impressed that the show selected her to be one. Make her The Bachelorette next season, and then I'll be impressed.