Upstairs now, Liz and Christina sit in a bedroom, Christina wondering briefly if she would even accept a rose were she offered one on Friday. From The Department Of Inauthentic Offers, Liz offers not to even go on the date, telling Christina, "If I don't go, that's one less person." Whoa whoa whoa. Slow down, Dr. Pythagoras! Let me get some of those numbers down on paper! I don't know how Andrew doesn't think they're a totally perfect match, when Liz should have the "how many kids do your siblings have" conversation with Andrew. But Christina notes that it doesn't matter how many people are there (it doesn't?), saying that in "real life" she doesn't go on "group dates." I have absolutely no idea what this argument is about right now.
Back to Andrew and Kirsten heading to happy hour at Jackrabbit Slim's. They pull into a drive-in movie theater, on which the marquee reads, "Memory Lane starring Kirsten and Andrew." Kirsten laughs uproariously, oblivious to the important cultural revelation that Memory Lane is totally the Heaven's Gate of the world's last drive-in. Kirsten and Andrew neck like teenagers because that's what you do at the drive-in and that's how a large number of us came into this world. We learn from Andrew, "The movie that I had planned for Kirsten and I [sic] were kind of a series of pictures from growing up until now." Oh, good. It's Bar Mitzvah: The Movie, except without that one shot of my crazy Aunt Sheila falling down on the dance floor during the reception band's rendition of "Pink Cadillac" due to an almost lethal overdose of Manischewitz, high heels, and bewilderingly cumbersome shoulder pads. That kicked ass. You want to be able to sit through all of Bar Mitzvah: The Movie? Don't cast it with a bunch of rich, icy WASPs. As indicated here. Picture of Andrew. Picture of Kirsten. Picture of Andrew, a little older. Picture of Kirsten, nose a little smaller. Picture of Andrew, pretending to be a football player. Picture of Kirsten, looking in her teens a lot more like a linebacker than L'il Andy ever will. ["Isn't this a crappy DeBeers commercial? I mean, more so than the whole series is?" -- Wing Chun]