Bachelor
The Women Arrive in Sun Valley, Idaho

Episode Report Card
Angel Cohn: B | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
The Women Arrive in Sun Valley, Idaho

Next morning, Matt takes his fab foursome out on the mountain. He's excited because he's dating four girls and "two of them are virgins ...on the slopes." Oh, the appeal of the British accent has officially worn off for me now thanks to that cornball comment. Robin thinks that Matt has some 'splainin' to do about why he doesn't want to have one-on-one time with her. Look in a mirror. That's all the explanation you need.

First up to hit the slopes is "virgin" Amanda, who I don't think has even said a word in this episode. She thinks he's a good teacher. Talking head Marshana is also a "virgin" but she's sucking it up. Unfortunately, she spends more time falling on her ass than talking with Matt. She seems bummed. Whatever, I still think I like her.

Chelsea brings Noelle her date box (again, not a box), which is a tray of cocoa to signify their ice skating date. Then back on the mountain, Matt's on a ski lift sucking face with Shayne. Wonder how naive little Noelle would react to that. Matt diaries that Shayne was his little snow monkey today. Is that a compliment in London? He thinks she's got mad snowboarding skills. Then when we see her again, she's pulling out makeup from her parka, to freshen up after a mini-wipeout. Matt loves this; they make out and roll in the snow.

Flash to Robin, who's at the top of the mountain on a snow board. Skiing alone and looking pissed again, she heads down the slope and crashes Matt and Shayne's giggling/face sucking portion of the date. Robin then confronts Matt about why she didn't get the one-on-one date. At this point I accidentally pause my TV on the ugliest looking expression ever. Clearly, he's got his reasons, and the faces and the interruptions of him getting some action have got to be top on the list. He's "aware" that she hasn't had a one-on-one and makes up some bullshit line about how he knew they had a connection, and therefore he didn't feel the need to hang with her alone so much. Then blames HER for not getting that. What a player! She says she'll be really surprised if she doesn't get a rose. I won't.

Hot tub time! Amanda drags Matt over to a little alcove to show off her boobs in a bikini. Then says that her parents live in a double-wide trailer and would serve him some possum. How quaint. Then there's more making out. Of course.

Finally, it's time for Noelle's big date. Matt's hoping to discover a connection between them. I think that's code for lip-locking, but I'm not getting that vibe from Noelle. Wait, she was in a bad car crash? She really is just way too sweet for this show. Matt thinks she's philosophical and he could spend the rest of his life with her...then he starts kissing her. Naturally.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5Next

Bachelor

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

Visit the Official Room on zeebox to join in the discussion!

The Latest Activity On TwOP