Harrison says it seems like things got ramped up with the catfighting and the bullshit really quickly, and then Marissa explains why that is, by describing how it's a bunch of people all in the same place and if you don't mesh with someone, there's no place to hide. She seems to forget that she's describing how things are on every season ever, which does nothing to answer Harrison's question as to why things escalated so quickly this season.

So: the parade of clips from the season: Madison's fangs, Michelle's black eye, fake boobs consigned to the dustbin of reality show infamy.

After watching the clips and everybody admirably keeping their dinners down, Lisa talks about how sarcastic Michelle is, and Stacey calls Michelle two-faced, and Marissa says watching the show presented a totally different person from the Michelle she thought she knew, and if that's the way she actually is, then she should just "own it." And then Jackie calls her a "spider" and now Michelle is starting to cry, and Jackie keeps on because I don't know how anyone could watch this season and feel any kind of sympathy for Michelle, and Jackie says the things Michelle said weren't humorous but "fucked up" and some of the women literally gasp at the dropping of the f-bomb, which is hilarious because they went on a show where they compete to be one of a select few women having sex with a relative stranger in the hopes of getting a proposal. "I really did go on this show for the right reasons," says Michelle, which is a sentence that has no meaning to anyone who has never watched The Bachelor and very little to anyone who has.

"I'm so sorry if I made you feel that way, Jackie, that really hurts my feelings," says Michelle, who tries the whole "I think we've all said things that we regret," and the other women are all "nuh-uh" and then Ashley H. tearfully defends Michelle, saying she got to know her and she's a "great friend" and a "great mother," and not everyone is perfect, and anytime Ashley wants to say anything that's not nonsense she should just go ahead and do it. Madison steps in with the only relevant reason, that Michelle was upfront about how she wasn't there to be anyone's friend: she was there for Brad, there to find a husband. And then Michelle says "for the right reasons" again, and Harrison tells us we've only "scratched the surface" and then he threatens to talk with Michelle more when we come back from commercial. Watching this show always makes me feel like I'm being punished for something.