Bachelor
Two Become One

Episode Report Card
Djb: A+ | 4 USERS: A+
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Bob assiduously cuts limes on the kitchen counter (a season spent in stretch limos driving to Harry Winston, and there's no one to cut the lime?) as Kelly Jo's limo edits itself up the driveway. She also brings a box of ambiguous origin and contents. Oh, it's a pie. He "loves pie." Yeah, you can say that again.

Bob throws steaks on a grill and tells Kelly Jo that this is the one thing he knows how to do. She tells him again that she loves him. He finds her "compelling." She's Compelly Jo. And that compliment is not on equal footing. Cut to not that many seconds later, where we discover the steaks burnt to a charred memory. Everything's broken. When did Bob start doing prop comedy? Is there a watermelon and a mallet in his future? Because you folks? In the front row? You guys are gonna get soaked.

It's later. They're sitting together on a couch, Kelly Jo making sure that Bob knows where she's coming from. He tells her he's pretty much right with her every step, but he apologizes that he can't give her more back emotionally. She leans in and kisses him, whispering, "That's what tomorrow's for." He smiles and is all, "Perfect," but in a way you know makes him afraid. Kelly Jo didn't have a prayer. Nice girl. Didn't have a prayer. Bob confessionalizes that he "could be very happy with her," in a quickly cut confessional that sounds like it precedes the world's biggest "buuuuuuuut..." Kelly Jo, meanwhile, can't wait until tomorrow, when Bob can finally tell her that he's in love with her. Buuuuuuuut...

Well, at least naked Bob shaving could probably save things. Oh, great. There is it now. We're watching Bob's technique (shave down, short strokes, repeat same thing over and over again) as he reports, "There are reasons to definitely want to move forward in a relationship with each these women." Kelly Jo is "vivacious." Estella is "open with her emotions." And, as much as Bob's excited about moving forward with one woman, he's worried about hurting the feelings of another, one who didn't do anything wrong." Except not ask your mom for her life story.

Estella wakes up in retake after retake, coming into consciousness and telling us that she's glad the day is at least here. Kelly Jo, meanwhile, vamps that the decision Bob makes is "going to affect [her] for the rest of [her] life." She really wants him to pick her. Bob, meanwhile, is "much less conflicted" now. Man, he must have had some great night of sleep last night. How much clarity usually comes in that period of time?

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Bachelor

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