She's shivering. "I find everything about you sexy," he says. They get back to work.
Dr. Mauer makes fun of Cathy for meeting him in such a plebian place as his medical offices, given their history. Given Amanda Montgomery.
"I would have expected to see you next in a hot-air balloon, or midair on a trapeze!"
But Cathy Jamison has a lump. Specifically, on her ass. Maybe there's a better word for it, but ass will suffice, and he asks her to lie down.
On the wall opposite her head, while Dr. Mauer works behind the scenes, there's a poster for a bathtub race. She smiles, brighter than memory.
"Paul and Adam would wear matching shirts. Paul was always so much bigger than all the other dads. He looked like a giant, hunched over Adam in that tub. Paul's fast. You wouldn't know it, but he can really move."
The lump is a met. As in metastasis. Things to duplicate. Things are heating up.
"Which in and of itself doesn't necessarily mean that the cancer's getting worse, it just means that now you can see it." Out from behind the scenes.
Dr. Mauer orders a scan, another scan, just to make sure; he doesn't even need to take it off unless it's bothering her. It doesn't hurt, but it's there. It exists, and that bothers her. Lenny found it, Lenny with his artist's hands, behind the scenes. Todd explains that it's outpatient, easy, but that there's sedation so she'll need someone to pick her up. She stares at the ceiling, curious to see how that turns out.
Dr. Mauer runs through the questions, and she admits the met was found this morning, by somebody else.
"So you told big fast Paul, huh? Good for you!"
Another lie. Something specific this time, something she knows Dr. Mauer feels strongly about, this time. It feels gross. It feels like what she'd always imagined cancer would feel like: A spongy sort of thing. Dark and grey.
"What if I'm making this worse?" Dr. Mauer shakes his head; there's nothing she can do to make it worse. Don't go to the mechanic and ask it how your car feels. He'll respect you less and more importantly he'll feel you respect him less. Not even if your car's come close to making him fall in love. We're not talking about Todd, we're talking about a doctor now. Don't ask him about this. She knows that.