Biggest Loser

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Jerry's Kid

The teams sort themselves out as to who will paddle and who will pull. As Jerry's ass is too big to fit in the kayak, Coleen will paddle for the Yellow. Amy will be in the kayak for the Red Team, and Shellay's refusal to get in the kayak means that Purple Amy will paddle for her team, too. The teams are off! While most teams are making progress, Purple Amy isn't getting very far. The land-bound members of the other team are feeding the kayak rope as their partners paddle, but Shellay decides to get it all over with at once and throw the whole big ball of rope into the water. This seems not to be the best strategy, as Amy is at a dead stop. Eventually Shellay realizes that there's a tangle in the rope that's preventing Amy from getting anywhere. It's a big 'ole mess, and they're screwed. Ed's strategy is to get as far out as possible from the dock, and at 90 seconds he's in the lead. Sami blows the horn and the team members on land start pulling. Phil pulls Michelle back to the dock first, and the Pink Team is out. Purple is out next, followed by the Brown and Yellow teams. It's down to the Red and Orange Teams, and Phil yells at Amy to paddle. There's a brief battle, but Orange wins in the end. They're having a good run of it, aren't they? Phil is frustrated, because he really wanted the RV for his family. Well, then, you should have pulled harder. Purple Amy tells us that the Orange Team may be strong, but they're not losing as much weight as everybody else, and that's the important thing.

The teams sit around the campfire. The other teams surprise Coleen with a birthday cake -- she just turned 24. Awww, youngster. She thanks everyone, and everyone gives her a round of compliments. It seems that people like her a whole lot. This makes Jerry tear up, and when it's his turn to say a word about Coleen he can't even talk! I can't take it! Coleen tells him that she knows what he's thinking, and he doesn't have to say anything else. Oh, those two love each other so much. I really hope that Jerry doesn't die! Vicky tells us that this little trip has been wonderful, but she wants to be back at the Ranch. Everyone else agrees, both because they need to work out and because there are showers there.

And then they're back! Everyone is happy to be indoors again. Ed and Heba cook some Jennie-O turkey and Ed says that he thinks they'll place in the top three at weigh-in. They're focused on staying above the yellow line, and as long as they do that, Ed says, he thinks they'll dominate. It's not the money he wants, but rather the health benefits and a skinnier future. Brady is anticipating that Bob will tear them a new one at the last chance workout. And then Bob is there! He thinks that everyone is going to tell him all about the great hikes and workouts they did. Wrong! When they tell him that it was a sedentary trip, he notes that they've been gone for several days with plenty of time to work out. Heba complains that they didn't know what to do while they were away from the gym, and Bob is all, "You were at the freaking Grand Canyon. Get outside and do something, bitches." He doesn't think it makes any sense.

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Biggest Loser

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