And then we have our passing out and puking montage! I guess it's a testament to how far we've come that none of these incidents are treated as big emergencies, but rather are just part of an amusing clip package. Jesse interviews, "It just kept going on, and on, and on, and on." Dan/Don says he can't imagine how two unknown trainers can possibly measure up to Bob and Jillian. I'm guessing we're about to find out.

Our cameras travel over the mountains and seas to what is known as "The Unknown Trainers Campus." Oh just tell us who these assholes are already. God. Turns out this campus is at the Biggest Loser Resort at Fitness Ridge in Malibu. We see the contestants run, with some sort of drill team guy yelling at them. Mystery Trainer #1 tells us that what sets him apart is his pre-med/science background. Training is a science, he says. Mystery Trainer #2, who is a lady, says that she's a boxer, and has been boxing for ten years. She won the Golden Gloves twice. Having overcome a lot of adversity, she turned to boxing as a way to tackle her problems. She's here to teach the contestants how to fight. All the excuses in the world mean nothing to her -- suck it up, she says. Mystery Trainer #1 tells us that he's one of the most qualified and best trainers in the country, and isn't about getting a quick Band-Aid fix. This is about these people losing weight and keeping it off for the rest of their lives. Jesus, okay already! All of these voiceovers are coupled with shots of the trainers in silhouette doing athletic shit. The contestants with the unknown trainers certainly seem like they've been through some beatings, so I guess that's good.

Back on the regular campus, Arthur lays down for a little rest. Bob implores him to get up, and then Jillian yells at him to get up. Arthur is in pain, and says he needs something for his leg. Jillian tells him that she has something for his leg -- a treadmill. Just as Bob is talking about how unfit his crop this year is, Arthur screams, "Oooh!" steps off the treadmill, and then just falls the fuck over like a weeble-wobble that does not pop back up. I guess maybe when you have a lot of fat to cushion your landing you can do that. Bob goes over to see what happened, and Jillian, who has a real sympathy deficit, tells him that Arthur just stood up and purposely fell down. Arthur complains a lot about his leg, but Bob and Jillian do not even give two shits. Jesse says that it was hard to see Arthur just tip over, and that he wanted to go over and help him. However, helping Arthur could mean denying him his growth. Also, I wouldn't want to tangle with Bob and Jill at this early stage.