What have I done today to make me feel proud? Very little, in fact. This show is bad for my self-esteem.
Well, folks, it's week twelve. We are reminded that our final four players were very, very fat during the first week. They were all pretty sad about it, and some of them had sagging man boobs. The trainers screamed at them a lot, and now they're much skinner. Moral of the story: get someone to scream at you, and you'll be healthier for it.
And then we visit the final four in the elimination room, after Allen got the boot. They're all pretty happy. And then Sami tells them that they're going home for 60 days, and in that time will discover what The Biggest Loser is all about. Basically, they're on their own and surrounded by donuts. And then they'll have to weigh in once more. Each of the contestants acknowledges that being home is going to be a huge test, and they'll have to take all of their learning from the past twelve weeks to their lard-filled houses.
We first head home with Danny to Broken Arrow, Oklahoma. He remembers when he first got the call from Bob telling him that he was on the show. He felt like he was being thrown a lifeline. Man, was Danny huge. He's one of those contestants who looks like a totally different person. Then we catch up with Rudy en route to Brooklyn, Connecticut. He tells us that the toughest part of being at the ranch was being separated from his wife and daughters, one of whom was four months old when he left. He's missed a lot. Including changing diapers. Not such a bad deal. But he probably won't die so soon now that he's skinnier, so it was really an investment. Liz heads to Chapel Hill, Tennessee. She says she has control of her destiny, and has a new lease on life. Not many people can say that. And then there's Amanda, who's heading home to Butler, New Jersey. She never thought she'd be here today, and says that the old Amanda would have quit a long time ago. She learned how to believe in herself.
Welcome home parties abound. Rudy's is in the giant log cabin where he apparently lives. Amanda's is totally in the ballroom of an airport Marriott. Or maybe all Marriotts in New Jersey look like airport Marriotts. Liz's party is at an outdoor pavilion of some sort, and cheerleaders await her. Danny's is in a giant house. There is much cheering and happiness and cries for speeches. Danny tells his family and friends that he felt hopeless when he left, but was thrown a lifeline by being on the show. He says that his absence was hard on his family and particularly his wife, who held down the line while he flew the kite high. He has something for her. They're already married, so this isn't all that exciting. But Danny wants to renew their vows. Rudy tells his family and friends that he's made a lot of progress, but has far to go. Liz speechifies that she threw a fit to come home when she was first on the ranch. But every week got easier and easier, and by week four she had figured out that she could do it. Amanda wanted to quit so many times, but every time she thought it was impossible she had to take an extra step. And lift an extra weight. And do an extra crunch. The contestants announce their weight loss numbers, to great applause.
We then flash back to first day Fat Danny telling us that when he was seventeen, he was a rock star. And had the mullet to prove it. Today's Danny wonders why he had the world in his hands and just decided to let it go. Well, donuts are tasty. Danny is figuring out that The Biggest Loser isn't just about losing weight, it's about getting your mind right and healing what's wrong. Dr. Phillian's message is finally sinking in! Danny says that it's all for nothing if he wins The Biggest Loser and goes back to that nightmare. To underscore his point, lighting flashes on the word "nightmare." With accompanying thunder. Danny takes a drive in the rain, because this helps him focus. He's gone from obese to thin a few times during his life, and says he has to figure out what caused him to let go of his dreams and gain 250 pounds. If he doesn't figure it out, he can gain it all back. Like season three's Erik!
Then there's Amanda. She told us on the first day that she's always been overweight. She also hides behind her weight, because it's all she's ever known. Amanda says, "Deep down, I am killing inside." We know what she means, but still. She was kind of a mess. Today, Amanda's scared of what's coming. She's in the honeymoon phase of being home now, but wonders how things might change in a week or two. Amanda goes to the gym with her best friend Brian. Amanda has a gay! Besides Bob! Brian is very encouraging, and Amanda tells him that she has to figure out how to make sure that she never goes back to fatville.
Fat Rudy tells us on day one that his older sister Kara was diagnosed with Leukemia when she was fourteen years old and he was twelve. Kara fought for a year and a half, and then passed on. Rudy's world changed in one day, and he says that his sister's battle with cancer started his battle with weight. Today, Rudy knows that he's going to have to confront some of his emotional problems. Rudy sits poolside with his wife, and she asks what he needed when he was younger that he didn't get. When Rudy was stressed, he ate. His wife says that he feels like he has to carry burdens alone, and that's why he eats instead of turning to others. She tells him that he has a right to his feelings, and shouldn't just have to eat them. Rudy says that he's ignored his emotions for a long time, so dealing with them now isn't going to be easy.
Liz told her husband before she came to the ranch that they were going to make some hard changes. He was like, "Whatever." But Liz was serious. And now, she says she's changed a lot through this process. She and her husband have known for years that they have issues. Liz says she had become bitter, resentful, and angry, and was empty inside. But that's not going to happen anymore. She takes a walk with her husband, and tells him that being on the ranch was a life-changing experience for her. She doesn't want to just get by for the next twenty years. Rather, she wants adventure and fun, which have been missing from her marriage. Liz's husband says he fell in love with adventurous Liz at the beginning, and he wants her to fall in love with him all over again. He interviews that he wants happiness between both of them, and that's all that really matters. And then he gets choked up and has to step away from the camera! Oh. They need to go sing "Islands in the Stream" at karaoke night, stat. Liz tells her husband that this is their second chance. She doesn't want a divorce, and wants to make their marriage work. I think the first step in this endeavor is making him shave that moustache.
And then the final four each get a Unabomber-style package delivered at their front doors. It's a video. The videos are personalized for each contestant, and feature Bob and Jillian giving encouragement and helpful advice. Bob tells Liz to ask for help when she needs it. I tell her to put down the cupcake. And then Jillian introduces an old friend. It is Fat Liz. Fat Liz confesses, on day one, that her weight is affecting her relationship with her husband. Basically it's because she doesn't feel sexy, which in turn makes her not want to bone him. She's afraid that her husband will leave her. In the present, after watching the video, Liz's husband tells her that he's proud of her. She says that this type of sentiment is rare, and welcomed.
On Rudy's video, Jillian says that he needs to practice how he's going to live the rest of his life. He deserves to be happy in every facet of his life. And then there's Fat Rudy, who talks about his family in his old-times interview. He doesn't want to be a deadbeat dad who can't even play with his kids in his yard. And he doesn't want to be a dead dad, either. Bob tells Rudy that 60 days is going to go by very quickly, and he can't waste even a day. Rudy tells us that the guy who wasn't sure how he would get through