After a commercial break, it's time to get down to business. Irene stands on stage, since we've already seen her, and then Hannah emerges looking great of body and face but wrapped in a really unfortunate dress. Where's Tim Gunn when you need him? What kind of drag queen hooker store are they getting these outfits from? Happily, Hannah seems to be growing out her bangs. She says that she's getting used to her new life and her new body, and her new home, which is the gym, where someone totally tried to pick her up and the shock of it caused her to drop a weight on her foot. Anyway, Hannah might have won this. She really looks fab. She says that asking for help and reaching out was the bravest thing she's ever done. I don't know, wearing that dress is pretty brave, too.
And then there's Olivia! Oh, I do love her. I mean, these ladies are fly, people. Olivia's dress is maybe an optical illusion, in a good way. Sami calls out Olivia's husband Ben, who is also a super hottie now and has lost a ton of weight. Olivia says that his way to connect with her while she was gone was to get on the treadmill every morning. He's lost about 113 pounds, without spending any time on the ranch at all. He followed Bob's Tweet diet. I should get on that. Olivia says that a whole new frontier of opera singer roles have been placed in front of her, and she's excited to play some skinny sexy vixens.
As the Biggest Loser on campus, Irene gets to determine the weigh-in order, which is Hannah, then Irene, then Olivia. But first we get introduced to new trainer Anna Kournikova, who apparently shops at the same drag queen hooker store as everyone else. She is downright scrawny, and if you kind of cross your eyes a little she bears an uncanny resemblance to Celine Dion. She's uniquely qualified to be a trainer on this show because of all the tennis championships she's won. OH WAIT.
Okay: final three weigh-ins. Hannah is first, and we get a montage of her being hilarious, as she is wont to do. Remember how much she wanted to bone Curtis Stone? It was sexual harassment but really funny because she's a lady. She and Olivia were especially cute together. Sami tells Hannah that she's won our hearts every single week, and now needs to get on the scale. Hannah goes from 248 pounds to 128, for a loss of 120 pounds! Holy shit! That is really fucking skinny, and yet Hannah manages not to look emaciated at all. Major kudos to her. Hannah's percentage lost is 48.39%, which seems like a pretty tough number to beat. She's so excited that she doesn't even want to get off the scale. I can't blame her. I would just stand there for, like, hours.