Oh, soothing balm for the soul! It's a one hour Biggest Loser. Thank you, Mr. President! I got so excited that I swallowed a grapefruit seed, which means that by the time of the next recap I'll have a grapefruit tree growing in my stomach. At least I'll never get scurvy.

On with the shortened show! We are reminded that last week Dan and Don punked out and each gained nine pounds and the scorn/condescension of the whole ranch. Dan, to his great happiness, was voted out. Jay tells us that it was clear that Dan wanted to go home, however the double nine-pound gain was a shocker and a jaw-dropper. Hannah talks to Don about possible changes to make to counteract his nine-pound gain. Don actually says that he's baffled by the number, and that it's not like he and Dan each ate a nine-pound ham. Marci could give two shits about his bafflement. She tells Don that the controversy affects everyone on the ranch, and also there are a lot of fat people out there in the world who could have had a spot on this show but instead it went to stupid Dan who didn't even want to be there. Marci interviews that, with Dan gone, Don needs to step up and be honest or else go home. Don tells us that he didn't want to be involved in any kind of controversy or nefarious activity. Should've thought about that before you ate that nine-pound Jennie-O turkey meatloaf, my friend.

The next day, the Known contestants meet up with Sami in the gym while doom-infused music plays. She reminds them that several weeks ago they had the opportunity to either train with Bob and Jillian on the ranch or go off with the Unknown trainers. Some made a deliberate decision, while others wound up with Bob and Jillian by default. But like it or not, they're on the ranch now. However, Sami says, that might change. Because before the day is through, one team will leave the ranch and join The Unknowns for an entire week. In my mind I always associate The Unknowns with The Infected from 28 Days Later, which gives me a panic that the departing team will be ripped apart by zombies. That would at least make the show a whole lot more interesting. Hannah and Olivia are not having it, and so are determined to do whatever they have to do in the challenge to stay.