Biggest Loser
Lead By Example

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Roll the Dice
s when struck by the pendulum. I should note that these pendulums are actually really wide -- more like swinging padded trapeze bars -- so it really takes some skill to get by them. Danni gets another plate across, while Jackson finally makes it across the beam one way. But, surprise, he falls on the way back. Danni gets her fourth plate, while Jackson finally makes it across and back once. Gina manages to duck under a pendulum, which is actually incredibly impressive. And then she finally gets a plate! It's the small victories, really.

Danni is first to have all plates (by FAR), but when she pulls her lever, she learns that none of her calorie assignments are correct. Yes, she has to face the giant swinging pendulums once again! The fact that she has none right gives Jackson hope for a victory, even though that's never going to happen. Danni get more plates, switches things up, and learns that she now has three right. And then finally she gets them all right! Phew. That whole thing looked like it took FOREVER. Danni is thrilled about getting letters from family and friends, and everyone else is glad just to finally be able to go home.

We then cut to Sunny in her gym class, where she's taking over as substitute teacher. She explains the concept of a fitness circuit, and sets up stations around the gym. Everyone is engaged and smiling, and Sunny is thrilled about it all. We don't get to see much of the actual gym teacher, but something tells me she could give Jillian OR Sue Sylvester a run for her money if given the opportunity.

And then Danni gets a letter from her dad and cries a whole bunch. She's proud of her strength over the past few weeks, and says that the letters from her family are giving her even more motivation. She wants her family to be proud of her, too, and is happy about having a boost for the rest of the week.

Then we catch up with Biingo, who has recruited his fellow activity club members to recruit future activity club members. A master delegator, already! This "club" seems awfully unofficial, but Biingo is still proud to be leading by example as an afterschool entrepreneur. Do you think he's charging a membership fee? Did Bob really just help him turn a simple scam into a pyramid scheme?

Back at the ranch, the Blue Team discusses the weigh-in pressure. While they talk, David spends some extra time on the stationary bike. He knows he's a goner if the Blue Team loses the weigh-in, and he doesn't want to go back to a life of shamefully eating 7-Eleven chicken nuggets for breakfast in his car. And then everyone works out to driving, intense music, and Gina tries to convince us that she hopes and prays she's the one to take the scale for the Blue Team. Fake it 'til you make it, I guess.

Oh, and then we get to see Lindsay hold a pep rally for kids who are being bullied. Or, also just kids, I guess. She tells them how much it hurt to be bullied every day at school, and starts crying. And then some audience members start crying a little, too. Some of the kids who actually were mean to Lindsay are in the audience, apparently, and she hopes that seeing the pain that she's gone through will make them feel horribly guilty until they're in the grave. Or, maybe that's my hope. I have to say that it's exceptionally brave of her to get up and talk so vulnerably about this to other kids. Her reward is the random appearance of Dolvett's "good friend," Australian pop star Cody Simpson. He has come to speak on behalf of Lindsay and against bullying, and to show his impressive skills in Auto-Tuned "live" performances. Lindsay says that it's the best day ever, but then again she's very, very young.

Not only is Dolvett friends with pop legend Cody Simpson, he's besties with one Miss Laila Ali! How can someone who gets punched in the face on the regular be so fly? We'll get more of her later, but in the meantime I'm wondering if we can punch the show in the face for the annoying Subway product endorsement. I mean, for the annoying footage of Jillian and Danni bonding over a six inch turkey Subway sandwich.

Last chance workout! Bob gives his team a master beating, while Jillian takes Danni to...something I don't even understand. I think it's called Park Whore? What? [Note: Parkour! Didn't you see that one episode of The Office, Potes? -- Rachel.] There's a guy named Bryan who bounces all over all kinds of shit in a big warehouse setting. Park Whore! One thing that I will say about this show is that it rarely captions the things that really need to be captioned. Danni tries to leap over something, as Bryan did, and falls flat on the ground. No giant swinging pendulums needed. But Jillian and Danni continue to leap over things, as you do when you're at Park Whore. Meanwhile, Bob has a mission to make Alex sweat. She doesn't look drenched at the end of the workout, but she is gasping for breath, which seems good enough for the moment. And then back at Park Whore, Jillian shares her favorite motto with Danni -- "Feel the fear, and do it anyway." That's what Park Whore says! Danni prepares to do a high jump into a foam pit. These are actual words, sequentially arranged to represent actual things. And really, she's already been knocked off of a balance beam by a giant swinging pendulum about thirteen hundred times, so why be afraid of a giant foam pit? Danni suffocates to death in the foam pit, thus making Jillian feel pretty stupid about the ill-advised move of bringing her to a place called Park Whore in the first place.

And then we're back with the Red Team and Laila Ali! Laila is a five-time undefeated world champion fighter, with a record of 24-0 with 21 knockouts. She's also a fitness and health expert, and a mother of two kids. She wants to show the Losers what a boxing workout really is. Laila tells the Red Team that she wasn't into sports or even active as a kid at all. She worked hard, and had to pay the cost to be such a boss. Laila gets them in the ring, and Jackson hopes that he doesn't throw up all over her. While Laila shows them jabs and hooks and stuff, Dolvett stands on the sidelines yelling, "Last! Chance! Workout!" I think he's glad for the break. They punch bags for a while, and Laila continuously tells them not to even think about stopping. Miraculously, Jackson does not puke! Laila tells them that they're getting stronger mentally and physically, and have inspired her.

And then it's weigh-in time! Ali is looking especially fly in a black and white dress with a smoky eye. Jillian is quite nervous about Danni's chances, given her huge number last week. Dolvett rolls the die for the Red Team, and Joe is the only one who actually wants his face to appear. And indeed, it does! The Red Team is excited. Jillian is not, given that Danni's chances are getting more tenuous as she goes up against big guys. Bob rolls the die for the Blue Team, and it's Jeff whose weight will count. Poor Danni! She kicks all kinds of butt, but this seems like a bit of a set up.

The Red Team weighs in first, and Jackson goes from 280 to 279, for a loss of only 1 pound. Dolvett and Jackson are both puzzled, and Dolvett says that the number doesn't at all represent the work that he put in this week, or all the meals that he threw up. Happily for Jackson, the number doesn't count. Francelina is next, and goes from 224 to 217, for a loss of 7 pounds. That's a great number for her, but of course doesn't count either. And then Joe weighs in. He goes from 299 to 291, for a loss of 8 pounds or 2.68%. It's a pretty good number, but certainly not insurmountable.

Danni is next, and Jillian highly doubts that she's going to be able to lose the 6 pounds she needs after pulling a 9 last week. But she goes from 213 to 207, for a loss of 6 or 2.82%! She's safe! Oh, Jillian of little faith! Both Danni and Jillian are shocked, and Jillian not

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Biggest Loser




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