The Red Team, for some reason, watches their home videos under the stars, where a giant video screen has been set up. Bryan's wife sends him a message, and you can tell that she totally wants to get down to some dirty sex talk, but she suspects that this video will be shown to the world. I think I've mentioned this before, but Bryan's wife is really cute. Next, Phil gets a video from his wife and adorable daughter, who for sure inherited Phil's big head. He cries. He's such a sensitive dude! I love it. Amy's little girls then tell her via video how much they love her. They're awfully cute, but in truth, they don't seem like they miss her that much. David's many kids -- one of whom looks exactly like him -- give a giant "We love daddy!" refrain. And then, woah! David's wife is a stone fox! If this show has taught us one thing, it's that fat dudes can land babes. And look at all those kids -- they clearly go at it like mad dogs. Go, David! ["Of course fat dudes can land babes, Potes. Don't you watch television? CBS sitcoms don't lie." -- Miss Alli]
As Jillian's team is making lunch, she approaches them in a way that indicates she's about to do something that embarrasses her tremendously. She starts off by telling them that one tip to avoid nibbling on things while you're making dinner is to chew gum. ["Ah, yes. The gum-chewing advice, given by many people who have never been fat. Eat a pickle! It's just like a bag of chips! Drink club soda while your friends are having margaritas, and you'll feel just like one of the gang! Fuckin' assholes. But...uh, back to the weecap." -- Miss Alli] Her favorite, she says while holding up a pack of gum with its name clearly displayed for the camera, is Wrigley's Extra Supermint gum. Only five calories a slice! I have to give Bob credit for the more seamless integration of the product placement, I have to say.
Meanwhile, workouts! Kim tells us that she needs six solid good days out of everyone on her team. She tells us that she saw that David was walking at only 2.5 on the treadmill, and that wasn't hacking it. She gets all up in his grill and starts pushing the buttons on the treadmill. David tells her that if she keeps doing that, she's going to lose a damn finger. And how horrifying yet awesome would it be if he just snapped and bit off her finger? I bet she would somehow manage to grow another one in its stead. David interviews that he was in no mood, and knows how far he can push his body. He runs, and Kim is all up in his jock the whole time nagging. She interviews that he didn't want to be pushed, but as his trainer, it's her job to push him. And, I might add, to motivate him. I think this is the key difference between Jillian and Kim. Jillian is all about the beatings, but she somehow manages to make her team like them, or at least appreciate them. It's like you know that she's on your side, and really wants you to do well. Kim, on the other hand, is just annoying. To wit: David asks her to please stop, and she brats, "No I'm not gonna stop." Oooh, good one. David says that then he'll work out outside, and Kim loses it and says, "You're going to work out where I f***ing tell you to work out." No she di'int! You never want to open the door to the f-bomb, because it will result in people calling you all kinds of nasty names. So I'd keep it professional, f***head. See? It's happening already. God, first Joy Behar and then this. She keeps yelling at him as he walks away saying that nobody talks to him like that. I might add that she could lasso him back using the veins protruding from her neck.