Biggest Loser

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Jive Turkey

Rocco and Ed work on poaching a turkey breast. Ed says it was cool to do it, and do it a way he's never done it before. Balls in the box, balls in the box. Next, Rocco and Heba work on the stuffing, which has no butter. What's the point of even MAKING stuffing, then? Rocco and Amy make apple crumble. Or, rather, Rocco makes apple crumble and Amy bats her eyes at him. Heba says, "Who needs to be married to a chef when Rocco comes to your house and cooks Thanksgiving?" She kids, she kids. Everyone feasts on their new healthy Thanksgiving meal and gets a copy of Rocco's new book, along with hometown team football jerseys. Isn't a football jersey something that you wear specifically to hide your big, turkey-filled belly, though?

And then it's time for everyone to say what they're thankful for. Rocco says that he's grateful to work with the contestants, because he learns a lot when he's there, and it makes him a better cook. Heba is thankful for meeting the other contestants, and that she can bring the changes she's learned on campus home with her. Vicky tells Rocco that she misses Brady and her children. She loves them, even though she could have cared less about getting videos from them a few weeks ago. Vicky tearfully interviews that she's homesick and misses her family. From the kitchen, my mom yells in colorful terms for Vicky to shut up. Mama Potes is on fire when she's baking cookies, yo. Michelle is thankful that her life and her health, and the life and health of everyone else at the table, has changed. Renee thanks God for the opportunity to be there and be with Michelle. They haven't had Thanksgiving together in a long time, and this will change their lives from here on out. You know this drill. She's happy to be able to tell Michelle that she loves her every day.

Orville Redenbacher has now managed to get on the Biggest Loser product placement train, you'll be happy to know. Beats hearing about gum again.

As a special Thanksgiving bonus, even though it was of course not actually Thanksgiving when this was filmed, everyone gets family videos. Heba and Ed get a message from his mom and the rest of his family, who have apparently used this whole thing as an excuse to have a huge party. Then they hear from Heba's mom, who is a 12-year breast cancer survivor. She is very emotional, and tells Heba that she can be the best winner ever. Where's Heba's dad that she's all weirdly obsessed with? Amy then watches a video from Shellay and her dad. Shellay tells her how much they miss her and love her, and how hard it will be not to have her home for Thanksgiving. Shellay looks even more like Allison Janney, and I can't help but get excited for 9 to 5: The Musical all over again! Amy, not thinking about how Dolly Parton wrote all the music for that show and how it is therefore going to be more awesome than a hog-tied Mr. Hart, cries. She says the video makes her homesick, but also motivates her. She knows her family wants her to stay to the end. Renee and Michelle then watch their videos. They get one from Michelle's dad, which is all nice and supportive. Michelle cries and Renee smiles. Renee says that even though she and Michelle's dad have their separate lives, she respects that he's there to encourage Michelle. Renee then gets a video from her cougar-bait hubby, who says that he's privileged to be married to her. He adds that she's his hero and has inspired him, which makes her proud. Vicky then gets her video from Brady and the kids. They're in a pool doing flips and stuff. Brady says that he was the king but now he's gone, so Vicky has to be the queen. Lucy, Vicky's daughter, wants her to kick some Biggest Loser butts. Vicky tearfully says that it meant the world for her to get to see her kids. I maybe actually kind of buy the tears for a minute. But I'd STILL vote her off as soon as I got the chance.

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Biggest Loser

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