Biggest Loser
Season 12, Episode 3

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Red Alert

Previously: Three teams, divided by the ages! A rivalry developed between the young Reds and the medium-aged Black Team. Nobody even bothered having a rivalry with the oldster Blue Team on account of how terribly they've been doing. They only have three players left! At least a collective AARP magazine cover may be in their future.

We enter with the remaining Blue Team players meeting with Anna. She laments the fact that Johnny didn't lose as much as he could have, and feels guilty for not being able to figure him out well enough to make that happen. And, please. That guy was a crotchety old coot. I come from a family of crotchety old coots, so I know them when I see them. Mike tells us that Johnny was taking a lot of Anna's time, which meant that she couldn't focus on the other players. Anna is confident that they have a good weigh-in ahead, because everyone who's left is completely motivated and committed. She talks a good game, but knows that the odds are stacked against them and that her job is at stake. She declares this "do or die" week. Sadly, when you're working with seniors, "die" is actually an option.

Suddenly, we're on a football field. Mike tells us that he's been a football coach for going on 40 years, so is right at home. There are giant cutouts of each Loser with holes in the middle of their stomachs. Hanging from these holes are football jerseys from various pro teams. Sami tells everyone that it's NFL week, and several of the dudes are pretty excited. Ah, yes, the NFL, paragon of health. She explains that the contestants will be competing in the forthcoming challenge as individuals. The holes in each of the contestant cutouts are targets. When Sami says go, the contestants have to run to the middle of the field, grab a football and try to get it in someone else's cutout hole. If the ball goes in, the player is eliminated. The last person standing gets $5,000.

But there's more! Sami says that if you want to be the best, you have to beat the best. She has some competition for the contestants. It's Clay Matthews of the Green Bay Packers! He's a linebacker, apparently, and a big fan of the show. And maybe a Viking. But there's more! It's Tony Gonzalez, who is a tight end with a tight end. He's also a Biggest Loser viewer and is psyched to help the current crop of folks reach their goals. I believe he is with the Atlanta Falcons. But there's more! It's the winner and MVP of Super Bowl 44 (or XLIV in football language), New Orleans Saints quarterback Drew Brees! Even I know who that guy is. Everyone is very, very excited, and Bonnie has a special appreciation for all that he and his family have done following Hurricane Katrina. The funny thing about Drew Brees is that he looks like he could be your creepy office tech guy. He's fought through adversity (e.g. various Windows operating systems), and so is here to tell the contestants that they can accomplish whatever they set their minds and hearts to do.

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Biggest Loser

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