Well, Miss Jeannie has got some work to do. She takes Chris with her first, and puts her face to face with headless mannequins wearing her old fat clothes. Jeannie repeats this process with everyone else, and there is much ado about the joy of NOT being a large, headless mannequin anymore. Nearly everyone recognizes an outfit that they wore on their audition tape. The Losers try on their old clothes, which totally don't fit anymore! Triumph of the spirit! Kim is quite happy to throw her old clothes to the side and try on some new, skinnier dresses. Jeannie tells us that she wants the Losers to have a sense of personality in their outfits. She also wants Jeremy to get himself laid. Part of the reason this week is so fun is that we've only seen these poor people in giant, brightly colored t-shirts and/or sports bras up until this point. The person who is clearly closest to (or maybe even surpassing?) his goal is Mark, who is completely fit and buff. He's, like, kind of a DILF now. Kim is not so far behind, and is apparently wearing a size six dress. She tells us that this makeover is the change-signifying icing on the cake, and it tastes like sweet success. Or maybe, in a more appropriate metaphor, this makeover is like the bag of apple slices you get with your low-cal Fresh Fit Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki Subway sub.
Next, the contestants head to the Ken Paves Salon, and we get to see if the guru himself can do something with Chris's hair. There's a Clairol lady in attendance, too. Mark looks dubious about this, like he's afraid that someone is going to attempt to dye his overgrown soul patch. Ken says a bunch of things to Chris, and I'm not entirely sure what he's talking about. Things get a bit clearer when he vows to put the sexy back in short hair. The Clairol lady can't wait to get her hands on Chris's gray head. Lots of shaving occurs for the dudes, and Conda agrees to cut her hair and donate the excess to Locks of Love. She makes the first chop herself, and automatically looks better. Ken is like the most excited elf in all of Elfland about the whole thing.