Biggest Loser
Season 13, Episode 3

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Hot and Sour

Bob and Dolvett then have their peeps do mini face-offs in the gym. Emily and Santa go head to head on the rowing machine, and Emily takes it by a hair. Kim and Chism also row, Chris and Mark do something with weights, and there are also some treadmill shenanigans. Cassandra and Conda have some action on a stability ball thingy, and Dolvett sweetens the deal by making them agree that the loser will buy lunch for the winner. Let me guess: Subway is somehow involved? Cassandra wins, but Conda claims that she cheated. Cassandra offers to redo, but Dolvett doesn't authorize that. Conda will have to spring for that five dollar footlong after all!

We cut to the kitchen where Conda brings Subway to Cassandra, with thinly-veiled annoyance. Cassandra snits back, "Shocking that you followed through." Oh, it is ON. Dolvett enters to find Cassandra munching on her sub and saying stupid shit like, "Victory never tasted so good!" and "It's sooo good going down." This is all a little ugly (yet lame!) even for Dolvett. Conda talks about battles and wars, but Dolvett is more interested in product placement. Think you don't have time to eat healthy? Go to Subway! Conda and Cassandra rehash the whole cheating controversy, and Dolvett suggests a last chance workout rematch. Conda claims that she will congratulate Cassandra if she wins fair and square, but I somehow doubt that that's true.

With that, it's challenge time. Sami starts off with an announcement: because Joe quit, the Black Team will be forced to forfeit his face-off. The Red Team is quite pleased about this, obviously, and Joe is lucky that he's many miles away from his erstwhile teammates. Bob and Dolvett appear, and will be coaching and supporting their teams during the challenge. This week, the challenge is a water relay. The contestants will pump water and pass it to each other through a series of obstacles including a water wheel, a ten foot wall, and a water chute. The first team to melt its block of ice and get to the prize inside will win. Sami assures them that the prize is well worth fighting for.

The Red Team opts to have Nancy sit out to even things up, and the challenge begins. Each team has a few designated pumpers. Megan, having lived on a farm, thinks that she will be a natural. The team members split themselves up amongst the various posts, and I have to say that this shit looks really tedious. There are lots of buckets involved. I don't know. Lots of water is wasted from point to point, and it turns out that despite her farm background, Megan actually sucks. Chris takes over as a pumper, and things get much better for the Black Team. The water is colored red and black, so it kind of looks like they're working with Hawaiian punch and grape juice. Roy gets clocked at the water wheel, and I fear that his beard might be dyed red. Things are pretty close in terms of ice-melting, and Bob and Dolvett generally do a lot of yelling. The Red Team is first to get their prize from the ice, and then their challenge is to get everyone across the finish line. Despite the fact that Roy gets the message a little late, the Red Team perseveres and wins. Their prize is a video chat with their families. Ugh, the worst! I mean, great for them, hell on a recapper.

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Biggest Loser

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