Biggest Loser

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They Got Fat Together, Can They Get Thin Together?

Challenge time! There are a bunch of gigantic balloons in the various team colors. Each team has to drag their balloon around a course. The team that comes in first gets to subtract two pounds from their total weight. However, there's bad news for the dawdlers. The team that comes in last will have to ADD two pounds to their total weight. Bette-Sue is PISSED. She's, like, ready to snap a Hasselbeck in two. Jenn thinks that her team has youth on its side and should be able to kill. Ali is trying to figure out how to motivate and encourage her mom. Mark thinks that he and Jay are the team to beat. Those two creep me out for some reason. Maybe they're aliens? At least Mark, for sure.

The teams are off! Wouldn't it be awesome if the lighter teams just floated right away like Gonzo? The challenge looks pretty hard, as the balloons are providing some serious resistance. Mark and Jay take the early lead, while Maggie and Jenn are surprised to find themselves dawdling last behind old-man-with-a-woman's-name Lynn. Bernie and Brittany, holding strong in second place, break into a jog near the end of the course, but it's not enough to take over eventual victors Mark and Jay. Bernie pukes his way to the finish line. This is what the dollar menu does! Beware its seductive ways. Bette-Sue feels gloriously about not being last and breaks into the "Beyoncé victory dance" that she's learning from the young whippersnappers on the show. Lynn and Jenni bust into a run at the end of the course and pass Kelly and Paul. Lynn looks like he actually might keel over. As it happens, the whippersnappers themselves, Maggie and Jenn, are last. Maggie is embarrassed to be last and gets all salty about the fact that the other teams were yelling encouragement. Drop the 'tude, slowpoke. Jenn feels like she let Maggie down, and knows that they're going to have to work really hard in the gym to overcome the two-pound addition.

At 10:45 PM, the contestants are still working out. Well, except for Lynn. Jenni doesn't think that her dad is working hard enough. Jenn tells her that she needs to express this, even if Lynn tells her to shut up. Ooh, you KNOW Lynn actually did tell her to shut up. He probably called her "dingbat" too, then went on a tirade about women's lib. Jenni goes to confront Lynn, who says he has blisters on both feet. She's not buying it. Jenni interviews that his decisions here affect her, and he needs to pull through. She tells him she's disappointed in him, and then starts crying, I'm sure because this brings up scenes from her youth. He sternly says that his feet hurt, and he can't do it. Jenni is pissed. I have to say, the whole couples thing was a MASTERSTROKE. So much drama! So much dredging up of old emotional wounds of the past, exacerbated by hunger and fatigue! Jenni bawls at the gym, then self-righteously interviews that now is the time to lose 200 pounds, and Lynn is sleeping.

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Biggest Loser

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