Maya cutely quotes that attending the sex party was more "a learning process" than anything, because she realizes she has no idea into what "acts" the Swingers are -- is it S&M stuff, or what? The huge sex party group enters the suite of sex sinisterly, leading us out to commercial. Back inside the Orgy Office, David turns down the lights to the Romantic But Not Really At All setting, and asks Maya (and, begrudgingly, Chris, who I guess insisted on coming along rather than staying at the Nugget and crocheting or something) if she's ever "watched." She grins shyly, and he asks, "Who do you want to watch?" This is, I think, the thing for David. The real fetish, presenting this world he's created to a cute girl and telling her it's all her playground, that he is putting it at her disposal, so that he can drive her mad with desire for him and his forces of rode-hard, put-away-wet darkness. Not getting it that this conversation is, for David, equivalent to sex, Maya stammers out a guess: "How about you two? Since you're...sitting right there?" It's cute, because you can feel the whole group (and Mark Burnett) go crestfallen that she didn't turn immediately into some sex-crazed porno Director of Photography like David thought she would: "You over there! Climb up on the back of that leopard-skin couch! Attach this to your left nipple at a 45-degree angle! You on the floor! Get that leg higher! I need two girls, with contrasting shades of dye jobs or wig color, on their knees by the fireplace, and someone -- you, David -- someone needs to go get the caramel sauce. Let's make this happen, people. I've got a second grade class to substitute teach on Tuesday and Momma needs some relief."
Episode Report CardJacob Clifton: F | 409 USERS: C+
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