The Casino

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: C | 508 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
In a Theme Park Future, Parents Love Their Children

Aww, the Tim and Tom Bukkake are hanging out together again, because they have no other friends. They're going to have a little dinner, I think. "Tim, I got you the pasta with the..." Tim starts asking about the fucking money some more. I actually throw some stuff at him. It's so irritating. Tom starts this fake bullshit conversation about how Tim is high-strung lately and everyone's worried about him. Tim kind of means it, even though this scene is totally 100\% fake, when he tells him to shut up. Tom starts talking about how there's this psychic "on the property," and then two conversations start happening: the one Tim thinks is happening, where they make fun of rubes and psychics and mumbo-jumbo, i.e. the conversation normal people would have, and the one that Tom thinks is happening, where they ask the psychic about things because she has magic powers, i.e. the conversation Tom would have. Just in case we needed some exposition, Tom offers: "I think she's just a guest, and then people found out she's psychic." "In other words, she's a wacko." Yes. But Tom, of course, is too. Also in other words, though, "This production team is too bad at their jobs to have signaled that information to us in any other way, through dialogue or tape, and had to copy it onto Tom's internal hard drive for playback during this bullshit." Tom totally wants to meet with her, and sends some random servant guy or something to fetch her. Tim makes the obvious joke tools always have to make, about how if she were really psychic, she'd be on her way already. Tom laughs his crazy, scary ass off about this joke. And you could tell it to him ten times in ten minutes, and he'd laugh every time, just like this, because he's insane.

Tommy goes to see Scary D, and D starts yelling at him immediately, without even asking to hear word one. He's full of curses, and says that Tommy did this all for "a piece of tail." Nice. He knew he'd see Tommy in his office, just not this soon -- ouch. "The only reason I'm not going to tell Tim is out of respect for your father." Tommy thinks it is so ironic. D tells him to get the fuck out of there. He hates Li'l Tommy so much.

Psychic Girl walks in -- pink, brown, and black-striped shower curtain tied under her armpits. This part is so fake I don't even care, y'all. Tim says he is skeptical and blah blah forthright blah blah I couldn't care less. "It's not really cool for me to look at you until you give me permission," she says weirdly, "and you actually have to have some specific..." He gives her "carte blanche" to ask him anything. Why would you want to look at Tim? He's contemplating some stupid business deal...more ultra-fakery about how does Tom know nothing about this deal, and some love-cakes kissy-kissy about what have I done that you're not involved in. Justine says outright that Tim is "ultimately not going to go through with this thing." My buddy Ali points out that this is not her psychic powers working, so much as how now that she has carte blanche, she can look at him and see that he is a total pussy with just her normal five senses. Also, Ali points out that he is bad at the four-in-hand tie knot, and it's "sloppy."

The Casino

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