ELSBETH TASCIONI LAW FIRM & PEACOCK FEATHERDUSTER EMPORIUM
Will: "Okay, but he's not going to pay us in imaginary money, right?"
Diane: "No, in super sketchy cash money."
Will: "Do we really need to fuck again with the government so soon? Bob Balaban was pretty intimidating, I hear, for being so adorable. I thought we were avoiding this kind of thing."
Diane, verbatim: "We swore off the ones based on idealism. This one has cash."
Diane, verbatim: "...And I know how that sounds."
Will okays it, and Diane can tell he's a little weirded out by Elsbeth's continuing weirdness, but he's also sticking by her because she is awesome, so Diane just promises to visit him in jail once a week and he signs off, smiling, just as Darth Wendy, Dana and Cary enter the cave of candyfloss dreams and toadstool concertinas that is Elsbeth's office.
Stack: "I'm pretending not to be scared about this, but I kind of am."
Alicia: "Yeah, you should be."
Stack: "I was kind of fishing for something comforting. But I guess the truth is comforting too."
Alicia: "My current conundrum, writ large. You are a rum one."
Diane: "...Okay, Will signed off and we're taking your case. Now just go take your cash and turn it into a cashier's check like a normal person, and we'll be great."
Stack: "Only in America is greater abstraction more desirable."
Diane: "I can already tell you're going to be highly enjoyable to deal with."
Alicia: "He's a rum one."
Elsbeth's office, which the last time we saw it looked like the climactic battle of a John Woo movie, now looks like the end of Fight Club, thanks to their having found asbestos in the walls, so now the walls don't even have walls. It looks like the end of the Cold War, with just like chubby little Gringott's employees in bowties waddling around with big baskets of dandelions. Fantasia's still nowhere to be seen but I honestly do think at this point she's a literal unicorn. Probably she's just downstairs going to town on some oats and clovers.
This is a proffer session, which I don't really know what that means but in practice it means that if Gardner can help them with their fake investigation into the imaginary bribery scheme that will somehow lead Wendy to her revenge against Peter Florrick, then they will drop the grand jury investigation and he will not, like any old ham sandwich, be instantly indicted. It seems like a deposition without the on-the-record part, in practice.