Ring ring!

Will: "Hey Diane, I talked to Crazypants and she said she wants half of the jetliner class action."
Diane: "She has the crew's families, we have the passenger families. That's 35%."
Will: "You know how she got the name Crazypants, right? It wasn't because of her pants."
Diane: "Just charm her! You know how you are, all the time? Be like that."

Alicia: "Are you guys talking about Celeste!? I mean, whatever. I mean I don't care. Who is that, even? Celeste, is that even, like, a person place or thing? Who are you guys? Where are we right now? What is this, a law office or something? I have to go. Bye now."

TRIAL

Their Kid: "Daddy, congratulations on making this the best birthday ever. I got to go through a metal detector!"
Cute Young Mom: "Travis, you sure do get into some scrapes."

Julius: "The guy's never even had a parking ticket."
Cary: "I know, that's why I offered second degree. Hey, have you met Imani? She's like my Jiminy Cricket, but of racial tension."
Julius: "Is that why you are trying to destroy a Cute Young Family? To impress her?"
Imani: "Um, actually, he's being totally fair based on the evidence."
Julius: "Okay, but what you don't know is that Peter Florrick has policy ADD. Last week it was all No plea bargains! and this week he's like No racism! and next week it'll be Use your ecomagination! You're just a fad. Later."

Julius: "So Alicia, how are you going to win this case later in the episode?"
Alicia: "No idea. Probably Kalinda will turn up some bizarre clue and I'll get all intuitive on it. But in the meantime, let's turn this preliminary hearing into a poor man's deposition and see what the prosecution has to show us."
Julius: "That's going to piss off the judge."
Alicia: "Yeah, except the judge is the Honorable Francis Flamm, aka 'Judge Tie-Dye' and played by Harvey Fierstein, who is still kicking around."
Julius: "God, remember Brian Kerwin in that movie?"
Alicia: "Remember him in Murphy's Romance? Criminy."

LEGAL AID

Diane: "Offer her flex time! The option to telecommute. Tell her we'll find her a corner office."
Will: "We're out of corners. Where are you, a football game?"
Diane: "Yes, my midday treat to myself. No. Legal Aid."
Will: "Come on, Diane, you don't have to break up in person. Just make a call."
Diane: "Yeah well, that was the plan, but my guilt was getting to me."
Will: "Guilt is for the weak!"
Diane: "Also, you should get a gander at the Legal Aid guy before you ask any more stupid questions. He is totally Conrad from Weeds."
Will: "'Nuff said."