PEGGY V ALICIA

Q: "And how long have you and your husband been separated?"
A: "About a year."
Q: "So you were separated, when you stood beside him for his gubernatorial announcement?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And you didn't find this hypocritical?"
A: "No."
Q: "You seem to prefer one-word answers."
A: "Yes."
(Translation: "No. Ya bitch.")

Q: "Are you really mending fences?"
A: "Sure."
Q: "Go on?"
A: "Look. My husband slept with prostitutes, which made our marriage difficult..."

Eli folds in himself, rolling his eyes and hugging himself tight.

A: "...But we have kids, one of them is pretty awesome, and he apologized for his wrongdoings, and I took a couple seasons to consider his apology. We were separated for that time, except for the occasional bout of public cunnilingus or Will-surrogate boning."
Q: "So but now you're together?"
A: "I said we were mending fences, you moron."
Q: "Do you live in his house?"
A: "I have my own apartment, but I also sometimes stay at his house."
Q: "In the same room?"
A: "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Eli begins interjecting quiet hoot-laughs, sort of hysterically but also in a very British, "aren't we all compatriots having quite a diverting afternoon" way.

A: "See, my life is my business..."
Q: "But you've made your life public, haven't you?"
A: "No, my husband has."
Q: "Okay, why do you stay with him? Why not get a divorce? Plenty of wronged women throw their shoes over the wall eventually."
A: "I don't feel like it, Kristin Chenoweth!"
Q: "Isn't that setting a bad example to women everywhere, to be such a doormat?"
Eli: "Kristin Chenoweth! Jesus God!"
Q: "New viewers need to be caught up, Eli. These are the questions asked by everybody who doesn't watch the show."