The reason for this is that Caitlin was born to it. The hardest thing in the world is explaining to your saviors that you get it, because they will never think you get it. You're standing on the shoulders of giants, and you know it; they just feel somebody stepping on them. But didn't you create this world, just for this? Weren't you the heralds of our equity? Didn't you fight so we could change shape, just like this?

Diane: "I tried to tell her. I explained how supportive the firm can be in situations like these. We have a generous maternity leave package, and child care, telecommuting options..."
Caitlin: "I get it. You will never understand this, and it's not your job to understand this, but I get it. I want to be..."
Alicia: "What, Caitlin? You can be anything you want to be."
Caitlin: "A mom. I want to be a mom."

Alicia Cavanaugh pulled down more billable hours in her first year as a first-year than any other attorney in her firm. But she changed her name, and she changed shape, and she left for Highland Park. And fifteen years later, she left Highland Park.

The second Caitlin stopped being her enemy, Alicia became her mentor again. The thread isn't unbroken yet. And if I know Alicia, she's going to go to Caitlin, and she's going to talk to her. She's not going to pull out all the stops, she's not going to try her own biography. She's going to talk to her the way Alicia talks to people, which is to say she's going to listen. And if I know Caitlin, she's going to explain it, and they're going to agree. And they'll both change shape again.

DUBIOUS GIFTS

(There ensues a long, perfectly gross discussion of whether ejaculate is a "gift" and whether semen is "abandoned property" and whether -- even if the turkey-baster thing is true, which it seems like it is, which is worse somehow -- contraceptive fraud is at issue. Judge Bebe Neuwirth allows them to make the argument, with disgust noted, and reminds them that the burden of proof remains on Mr. Sweeney for this claim. Which is still a long way from boxing out Gerald Drescher as CEO of Herald Equity.)

SWIFT TESTIMONY #2

Isobel: "Yeah, Gerald paid me for my job. I didn't check the origin of the payments, just cashed the checks."
Caitlin: "Without any expectation of a quid pro quo?"
Isobel: "I'm just a porn star, I don't know your fancy talk."
Caitlin: "Right. No trade-offs, no further expectations?"
Isobel: "Nope."
Caitlin: "And your testimony, Isobel -- Ms. Swift -- has been that you had consensual sex with my client, which resulted in the child."
Ms. Swift: "Yes."
Caitlin: "Okay then how come you took this class on artificial insemination at the Kenwood Learning Center in February 2008, right before the blowjobs started?"
Ms. Swift: "..."
Caitlin: "Do you need a moment, Ms. Swift?"
Alicia: "My God, she's magnificent. Lockhart and Associates desperately needs this litigatory light among our ranks."