Diane: "Kalinda, fix it. Fix it!"
Is doing Eli Business as usual. He drops into a chair beside her and she's like, what now.
Eli: "Adam Spellman. Do you know who that is?"
Kalinda: "I am Kalinda, of course I do. He is a businessman, and head of the Chicago Black Leadership Council. His address, social, and current weight are on this index card which -- what's this? -- you've had in your left ear the entire time. Now it has vanished! Or has it? Check your breast pocket."
Eli: "You are a wondrous beast. So listen, I need you to vet him for the DNC, as a favor I'm doing them out of my kindness and generosity. I would just hate if you found any skeletons in his closet."
Kalinda: "Okay but really, why?"
Eli: "For narrative reasons, I won't even bother to tell you yet. Just ruin his life immediately and we'll talk about it later."
Kalinda: "Everybody needs everything immediately all the time. Good thing I'm not cracking under the pressure or slowly being isolated from the few people I care about."
(She finds something and goes A-ha!)
Eli: "That was quick!"
But it's like, Diane just called her and she did magic anyway, so it's not exactly absurdist comedy that she would do this. She was on the phone with Diane when he walked up, so Diane's needs had like a five-second jump on Eli's, and while she was discussing it with him, she was researching Diane's stuff, and now that she has, she will probably somehow be investigating Spellman while briefing Diane and Celeste on her findings here. My fear is that if you are too efficient you will propel yourself backward in time, resulting in fine lines and wrinkles, which is why I do everything at the last possible moment.
Kalinda: "It was a blind CC. Ritter e-mailed the CEO about the de-icing problems, and on Ritter's copy, there were only two e-mail addresses included in the CC. But on the CEO's copy, he BCC'd someone else, the VC guy on their original IPO. CS at HeraldEquityGroup?"