The Good Wife
Pants On Fire

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 3 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
The Alford Doctrine

Callie: "Hey, mister! It's tough. Not to talk about legal actions in which your firm is taking part, but those kids don't care about money right now -- just their freedom. Anyway, you're still two months out of a six-month suspension?"
Gardner: "Yeah. I wrote a book that is not great."
Callie: "Me, it was a year. Addiction to cocaine that led to overbilling."
Gardner: "In some ways, we have a lot in common. Other ways..."
Callie: "Hey, some of my best summations were on coke. Don't I seem chiller now?"
Gardner: "Heh, yeah."
Callie: "Listen, my glum chum, I know it's been three years since we tried dating, but now you know I only stood you up so I could go into rehab. And let me tell you, there is a sparklingly enjoyable support group for those of us who've been censured or suspended."
Gardner: "Is this your idea of asking me out?"
Callie: "I am acting like a quintessential person in recovery, so yes."

MEDICAL EXAMINER

ME: "Kalinda, where you been?"
Kalinda: "Hibernating? Whatever you call it when the showrunners decide to punish their viewers for an entire year by taking away the central relationship of the show."
ME: "Well, luckily you're no longer persona non grata around here. What can I do for you?"
Kalinda: "I need the clue to end the case, and I am assuming you'll give it to me this early in the episode."

Note from Cary on the clue in question: "Haha! Good luck, kiddo!"

Kalinda: "That was cute."

She sticks the post-it to the ME's chest -- also very cute -- and goes through the file. But then, there it is! A weird mark on the girl's ankle that nobody noticed! Even the ME is like, "Once again, Kalinda, you keep the wheels of Chicago justice turning with your skills of being very observant." And, because she is being adorable this episode, she just grins at him like, "Yep."

GOLD & ASSOC

Alicia: "Eli! He's lying! He's a fatty-fatty two-by-four with pants aflame!"
Eli: "Sure, of course."
Alicia: "No, I mean it! Lying! Tell not trues! On television!"
Eli: "Yeah. Calm down."
Alicia: "I most certainly will not! I am scandalized!"
Eli: "So you weren't on a Blue Ribbon Panel where you figured Peter helped cover up police corruption on a grand scale?"
Alicia: "I wouldn't charac... It's confidential! Put out a statement! About his pants!"

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The Good Wife

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