Bucky: "Mr. Waters, thank you for taking time off from saving America to be here."
Waters: "I just want to clear up this horrible mistake."
Bucky: "Right, so the claim is that you attacked the Plaintiff on April 30, 2011, at Camp Dwyer in the Helman River Valley of Afghanistan..."
Waters: "Laura, I'm really sorry, but that didn't happen..."
Alicia, verbatim and terrifying: "Sir? Two things. Don't address my client. And when you do refer to her, it's Captain Hellinger."
Everybody leans back. Even Hellinger leans back. Mama don't play.
Waters: "Captain Hellinger was there negotiating roads and hospitals contracts. We'd run into each other socially at the Morale/Welfare/Recreational center..."
Bucky: "You were drinking at the MWR that night, right?"
Waters: "There was a party for new reservists, of which I was one..."
(I had that weird Spidey-Sense feeling when he said this, but I didn't know why until the end of the episode. Ugh.)
Bucky: "And then you both went back to her office in the 35th Combat Support Hospital..."
Waters: "We both had offices there, but yeah."
Bucky: "And you threatened her with a demotion if she refused to sleep with you?"
Waters: "That's not possible, I have no..."
Hellinger: "Because you're friends with Major Hart!"
Abernathy: "You gotta be quiet. This is a courtroom."
Waters: "Captain Hellinger was tipsy, I asked her if she wanted me to take her to her barracks. She said no. She kept hanging on me. All I can imagine is that she took offense at the way I was rebuffing her, I don't know..."
Bucky: "So she was asking for it -- begging for it, even -- but because you're an American hero you refused to give in."
Waters: "Yes. In fact, I sent an email at 0010h, which is when the attack supposedly occurred. Not to brag, but I do try to keep focus during my rapes. You never text while driving, and you never email while raping. That's just the kind of values they instilled in me at the Chauncy Stormtroop Center For Pretend Tactics, Concealed Weapon Licensing & Crossfit Aerobics, located just off the highway next to a Ross Dress-For-Less."
Alicia: "Whatever, Kalinda will deal with this."
Kalinda: "He sent the email."
Alicia: "Dang. Well, maybe he's not the conscientious rapist he claims to be."
Kalinda: "Ah, but look at this list of all the emails that were sent that night. One of them was from one office over, three minutes later."
Alicia: "You mean somebody else was also multitasking during a rape, right next door? What are the odds?"