*(I thought maybe we could estimate the time since the finale based on the time between the election and the holiday, but the forums are telling me it just doesn't add up regardless, so that's one more thing I'm not going to worry about.)

LOCKHART, GARDNER

Jewish League Taub: "Mr. Gold."
Eli: "Well hello! Listen, look at this amazing campaign I'm doing for the Muslims. Arab Spring! Sort of like Irish Spring, but with Arabs."
Which: Also sounds vaguely racist. Everything in this episode gives me hives now. The world is a vampire.
Taub: "Look, please let me bring the Jewish League Fund over here. I'll pay what I was paying Tarkovsky, and you will stop pitching a fit, and you will have to drop Wasid."
Eli: "Okay, but also you have to pay some additional money to defer the cost of lost business."
Taub: "You are the worst."
Eli: "That is why you're here."

COURT

Judge: "Alicia, you have managed to shame me out of doing a competent job I know I can do, which makes you an asshole. So I'm going to recuse myself."
Cary: "First, can I point out something that Peter told me? Tomorrow is Rosh Hashanah."
Judge: "I forgot that, because I'm a champagne liberal who gives money to Israel because it's the right thing to do, and takes holidays when I'm reminded I can."
Cary: "So even though you're not even a hardcore Jew, what Alicia's doing is making sure that no super-Jewish Jewish judges will be on the bench. It's not even about you."
Judge: "That makes sense, actually. Grody. Alicia Florrick, I hold you in contempt. Not contempt of court, just regular."

GAY BAR

Since Alicia has well and truly fucked herself, it's time for Kalinda's patented move where she solves the case in five seconds. She and Sophia track Tariq to his favorite gay bar, toss around some Chicago-centric gay bar chatter, tackle him onto a barstool and force him to confess:

They were together, Simon dumped him, Tariq lost his shit, stabbed him a bunch of times and then tried to make it look like a hate crime by stabbing him a bunch more times and adding the piquancy of a swastika. (See, I told you Alicia was onto something. This is exactly the kind of drama queen shit a college student would pull.)