The Hills

Episode Report Card
Kim: A- | Grade It Now!
Air Burrito

Previously, Heidi's sister Holly thought about moving to Los Angeles but Spencer didn't want her staying with them because, like most abusive partners, he wanted to isolate Heidi from her friends and family. Lauren dumped Doug the Dud, and Audrina told Lo that they would never be friends. And now they're all going to Vegas for Frankie's birthday!

Lauren, Stephanie, and Lo walk out onto the tarmac of a private airport so that they can take Doug's jet to Vegas. Either Stephanie or Lo voices everyone's thoughts when she says, "You broke up with a guy who has a jet?" Oh, frozen burritos. How you create ostentatious displays of wealth. Anyway, they all board Air Burrito, and have I mentioned that Stephanie has on the shortest skirt ever? Lauren mentions that Audrina and Justin Bobby are coming on a different plane. Like, another private plane? Or are they flying commercial? Anyway, Lauren looks stressed out about it. Brody douches a speech about how he's glad Stephanie is there because it's almost as good as having Spencer there. Stephanie, who was looking kind of hopeful that Brody was giving a toast to her, is crestfallen. Lauren looks like she has a headache. Oh, dear.

Vegas. The group arrives at their hotel in two limos and head to their rooms. Lo asks Lauren if she's going to make out with Doug or Brody tonight. Lo places her bet on Brody and Stephanie goes with Doug. Lauren doesn't think she'll make out with either of them, because she's "been there, done that." Why doesn't anyone ever make out with Frankie? Is he gay? Or is it because he's not in the opening credits? And isn't heir to a frozen burrito fortune? Lo has to up the drama by bringing up Brody's toast. Stephanie isn't sure why Brody has been telling Lauren not to trust her, and Lauren thinks Stephanie just has to prove him wrong. Stephanie looks confused. She's probably thinking about her hamster/guinea pig.

Heidi and Spencer's Apartment. Spencer is avoiding work as usual and playing in his mini-arcade. Heidi walks in and gives him shit for not working, and then announces that Holly is moving out there, and Heidi invited her to stay with them. Spencer, of course, isn't happy about that. Heidi tries to appease him, but Spencer acts like a child. Maybe if he had a job, and actually left the condo for a reason other than to plot evil deeds or go out to dinner, he wouldn't mind having a houseguest for a while. And have I mentioned how shitty their condo is for people who allegedly gets so much money from both this show and their personal appearances? Which is another piece of evidence that those "facts" that have been reported are total bullshit, fabricated by Spencer. Spencer threatens to move out if Holly moves in, because he thinks it'll ruin their relationship. How could it be worse?

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The Hills




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