The Hills

Episode Report Card
Kim: C+ | Grade It Now!
Forever and Nana, Amen

People's Revolution. Whitney gives Lauren a task that probably involves handling clothing, since that's her specialty. Whitney is still dating the band guy from NYC, and the producers are satisfied that they've successfully set up the spinoff, so Lauren moves on to talk about Audrina. They're supposed to meet, but Lauren doesn't want to go. Whitney wonders if Audrina might have something different to say. Lauren can't imagine what that would be. Whitney thinks Audrina might need someone to talk to, and she appeals to Lauren's loyalty as a friend. Lauren just shakes her head. I think Lauren should just ditch all of these people and move in with Nana.

Stephanie and Nana go for a stroll by the beach, just the two of them. Nana thinks they should have time along together. Stephanie says that she feels like she's not included when Nana comes to town, because Nana just spends all her time with Spencer. Stephanie explains that she knows that she should fight to spend time with her grandmother, but it's just too tough, and she suggests that Nana take a closer look at Spencer's ways. See? Stephanie is just as devious as Spencer. She's just not as overt about it. She's all Mean Girls instead. Next thing you know, there's going to be a three-way call where Stephanie tries to get Spencer to talk shit about Nana, while Nana listens in on the extension. Nana says that Spencer treats her well and "life is sometimes a bucket of worms and you don't know what to do with them." What does that even mean? Nana counsels Stephanie to wait until Spencer grows up a little bit. It kind of sounds like Nana knows that Spencer sucks, but she can't say it. They decide to go shopping together more often. I smell a spinoff!

Lauren and Audrina meet at a fancy restaurant. Audrina knows it's a mess, and she apologizes for jumping to conclusions. Lauren reiterates, "Some crazy person told you a crazy story." Audrina fairly sincerely apologizes for not trusting Lauren and causing damage to their friendship. Lauren says that she realizes now that Audrina doesn't trust her, but she gets why she doesn't trust JB. Lauren lays it all out and says that Audrina always goes back to JB and gives him the benefit of the doubt even when he has cheated on her, so it's way worse that she cut Lauren off so completely based on one ridiculous rumor. Audrina then says that she doesn't trust anyone. Didn't Lauren just say that Audrina trusts too easily? The word trust has lost all meaning. Audrina starts crying and says that her life has been unhappy since she's been with JB and she feels like she's lost herself. Lauren wants her to know that people do care about her. Audrina has retreated inside and she knows it's not healthy. Lauren promises that she never wants Audrina to be sad. Man, if I had a friendship this dramatic, I would cut that person off. It looks fucking exhausting. And expensive! With all the dinners out in restaurants to endlessly discuss everything! Lauren and Audrina leave the restaurant and hug over their renewed friendship (I guess) and then there's like thirty seconds of Audrina just standing outside the restaurant "deep" in "thought."

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The Hills




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