Spencer's tux fitting. Two randoms claiming to be groomsmen show up, and Spencer's "friend" is there, too. While the others get fitted, Spencer's "friend" mentions that he's planning to bring Bartender Stacie to the wedding. Jesus, how stupid are you people? He hatches a plan to obscure her with an ornate hat. It's just screwy enough to work! Pffft. Instead of putting his foot down like a real man, Spencer advises his "friend" to keep BS 40 feet away -- as if that would be enough, then gives a thumbs-up on the veil scheme. "Friend" asks about the mechanics of the ceremony, and Spencer jokes that he got the preacher to take out the "If anyone objects..." part. At least I think he's joking. The friends need clarification, too, so Spencer laughs about how the preacher couldn't believe anyone would ever truly object at a real-live wedding. To which Spencer said, "You don't know my friends and family... and producers... and script writers... and agents... and gossip blogger hangers-on!"
LA House farewell BBQ. In attendance are all the regulars, plus Bunney, The Bunny, Frankie, D-Bag Doug, et al. Lauren gives a touching, if mildly egocentric, speech about how she (and Lo) hand-picked the group of people that they've invited to spend their last night there with them. These are the folks who've seen the best of times and the worst of times, their eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lauren. But now it must come to an end. Or as we say in TV lingo, "Jump the shark." They all cheers to how beautiful and popular they are. Audrina gives the obligatory "I can't believe life is changing all around us here in Grover's Corners" speech, but dumber. Long story short, they all invest way too much importance in this place.
Brody follows Steph over to the grill to essentially apologize to her for not trusting her and generally being a prick to her a lot of the time, even if maybe she deserved it. She really does have to have everything spelled out to her. I think she may be functionally retarded, y'all. She does make a funny that she can "stop wearing waterproof mascara now." Point to Short Bus Pratt!
Steph heads inside, where Lauren is tidying up. Lauren asks if Steph and Brody are okay. I love that they have to do the rehash even now, during the super-exciting last episode, when they're all in the same place, in earshot. God bless consistency. Steph makes one last plea for Lauren to come to the wedding. Lauren continues in her steadfast refusal for this contrivance, mainly so the contrivance won't seem so contrived when she makes it happen. Lauren bounces outside, where people somehow magically know that she and Steph were talking about the wedding. Frankie asks if she's going, and she smiles evilly as she snarks that she'll go to "the next one." Bitchy Lauren FTW! Everyone hugs, cheek-kisses and disperses. Commercials.