The Hills
You Know What You Did

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You Know What You Did

So Lauren's now drunk and pissed off that Heidi still won't admit that the rumor came from Team Speidi. Elsewhere, Heidi's similarly bitching about Lauren. Spencer urges her to "roll up on her," like, what does that even mean? He's speaking gibberish words. Even Heidi's like, "Do what now?" So Heidi (sans Spencer) does track Lauren down and asks her what her problem is. Lauren's all, "Oh I think you know." No one dares utter the phrase "sex tape," which makes this the only time in the history of humankind that I kind of wished Perez Hilton had been walking past at that moment. Lauren gives Heidi the hand and says she never, ever wants to talk to her again. They bicker back and forth about whose life is more deserving of pity (answer: whoever has to log these tapes) and then Lauren starts with the "You know what you did" portion of tonight's argument. Heidi feigns ignorance, forcing Lauren to hedge closer: "You started a sick rumor about me." Heidi's inflection tells all: "I didn't start any rumors about you." Lauren doesn't pick up on it.

Back inside, Audrina's reassuring Lauren, while Heidi and Spencer leave. On the ride home, Heidi is so devastated at the evening's sour turn of events that her eyebrows have dyed themselves brown again. Seriously, MTV, we've been freaking out about those things for 20 minutes; obviously we'd notice.

Some undefined time later, Heidi's walking-and-talking with Elodie, her "friend" from "work." She's recapping the events from Frankie's party. I'd get all indignant about Heidi stealing my gig, but Audrina's the real victim here. Rehashing what we just saw to uninterested third parties is HER gig, damn it! And THEN, it's Lauren's turn to tells us what we already saw, via a workroom convo with Whitney. Whitney, by the way, is utterly incapable of seeming spontaneous in these little scripted interactions. Her one worthwhile contribution is a nonplussed "Double-you tee eff?" Once they go off-book, however, Whitney's great, commenting on Lauren's chronic friend troubles. Lauren says she's happy to have her current support network: Lo (!) living in L.A. now, Whitney at work, and Audrina at home.

But Lauren's still feeling the sting of Heidi's betrayal (seriously, I could write ad copy for this show, right?), and tells Whitney that it feels like one of her friends died: "That friend? Is gone." Whitney offers that maybe Lauren will be better off Heidi-free. Lauren: "I am so far."

Hit it, Michelle Branch-ian cover of "Umbrella"!

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The Hills

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