Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency
Cut The Fat

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This Little Piggy Started A Modeling Agency

Meanwhile, Janice goes to see Dr. Frank Ryan at 9:00, the scheduled time of Teresa's appointment. Teresa is not there. Janice is wearing a leopard print head scarf and looks completely nuts yet appropriate for a visit to the plastic surgeon's office. There is no receptionist, so Janice just shows herself to Dr. Frank's office. Janice tells Dr. Frank that Teresa needs a nose job, straight-up. Janice notes angrily that it's 9:05 and Teresa is not there. Soon, it is 9:30, and still no Teresa. Janice says that when models are late it can mean a loss of millions of dollars, and then asks if she can get a little botox while she's there. At 10:30, Ethan says that he told Teresa to be "at the corner where she's staying" at 8:00 AM sharp. He also told her to give him a call the day before and she never did that either. He should have tried the time-honored technique of attaching a $5 bill to a fishing pole and just leading her to the doctor's office that way.

Janice asks whether Teresa is okay, and Ethan says that she's homeless, so really could be anywhere. Janice says that when she was homeless in New York, she was never late for an appointment. She adds that something smells fishy to her, and that's her first instinct. Janice tells Ethan to find out if Teresa is okay. She then says to Dr. Frank that she needs a body cream, and a hunky menial laborer to slather it on her body. Okay, maybe she was just thinking that last part. Janice interviews that Teresa Cutie had the unmitigated gall not to show up. "How does that make me look?" Janice yells. Like a corpse, same as usual. Back at the doctor's office, Janice yells into the camera that Dr. Frank canceled a face lift, do we get it? An ominous, "She'd better have a good excuse today, honey," leads us to commercials. As Tootie would say, Teresa is in trouuuuub-lllle.

When we return, Teresa tells us that today she's meeting with Janice. She hopes that Janice will listen to her points of view, because she would really like to continue working there. Teresa has what experts like to call "false hope." She walks into Janice's office, and Janice says, "Oh, my God," and adds that she didn't know Teresa was coming. Janice gives her a hug and then says, "I'm mad at you." Janice has dead-eyes, which makes me think that she is in some way chemically altered. This does not bode well for Teresa. Teresa asks why Janice is mad, and Janice says because she never showed up for the appointment with Dr. Frank. Teresa just says, "Oh yes. I know." Yeah, she's going to have to do a little better than that. Janice asks for some explanation, and Teresa kind of avoids looking at her. Teresa sits down and says that she's been thinking about quitting. She goes on to say that when Janice first met her, she said that she would help Teresa out with her housing situation. Janice did, in fact, say this. Teresa adds that if she didn't think she was going to get any help in L.A., she would have gone back to Florida, where she does have housing. The way that she says "housing" makes me find her really suspicious. I think Janice finds her suspicious, too, because she says that it's not her responsibility to find Teresa "further housing" or to become her mother. Janice adds that she's not getting Teresa's attitude. Teresa then actually says, "Okay, now, continuing on." Oh man, is she in for it.

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Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency




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