Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency
The Axe Falls

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Au Revoir, Bitches

Next is Marcus, whose charisma, according to Janice, sells him every time. However, she says, he's got to shake his attitude. Janice tells him that he needs to show some commercialism in him so that they can see him on billboards, and not gangster stuff. Marcus kind of sasses her.

Then there's skinny Adrian, cute Andrew, fierce Pierce, and my boyfriend Tony. Janice voices over that models must find a character, a passion, or something inside of themselves, because she can only bring so much out of them. As we get more model montage, Janice says that she is learning more about the industry from an agent's perspective, and it doesn't feel that nice. She says that she would never want to represent someone like her. Someone who, for example, next says something completely unintelligible that I am not going to even bother to untangle here.

Next we have Chrisanne, who poses in a bustier and underwear on a couch. Janice says that she doesn't like it, and adds that she wants to photograph Chrisanne like she's dead and has just stabbed herself. Chrisanne is game to act all dead and shit. Janice thinks that it's hot, and that Chrisanne has never looked so good. I would say that that's a backhanded compliment, but I kind of suspect that Janice is a necrophiliac. That's the only way to explain the intense self-love that she seems to possess. So anyway, that could just be a straight-on compliment. Chrisanne tells us that toward the end of the shoot, Janice asked if she would pose nude. Oh, here we go. Chrisanne told Janice that nudity was a personal boundary that she was not comfortable crossing. But posing like a lingerie-clad corpse is totally cool, and almost something that you could do with your class if you were a kindergarten teacher. Janice asks Chrisanne why she won't go nude. Chrisanne says that it's too much exposure, and she has to be true to who she is, and that is someone who simply loves dead people in skimpy panties. Janice tells us that she has some thinking to do, because even though Chrisanne is a stunning woman and Janice respects her morality, how can she work for designers without taking her clothes off? And really, if there's one thing that we've learned from Top Model, it's that you always get naked when they ask you to.

Next is cute Natalie. Natalie tells us that when she first came to the agency she had never done any modeling and was very afraid of rejection. Janice tells Natalie that what she likes about her is that she's game for everything, including a nude shot. Natalie gets nekkid to great acclaim. Natalie is comfortable with herself, unlike a lot of the other models. And the discomfort is not going to work in Janice's agency, where nudity is the new couture. We see naked Trisha, and naked Chris Jones. Janice tells us that she has to make sure that her models are open to do whatever a designer asks them. Janice also calls Chris Jones the whitest cracker she ever did see. Heh. Billy seems a bit uncomfortable about getting naked. He says that he was iffy, but he trusted Janice when she said that it was a really good look for him. Okay, that is hilarious. Janice makes Billy scream as he holds a football over his bits and she pours water over him. She is totally working out all of her kinky issues in this episode.

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Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency

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