Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency
Vegas Baby

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And then, as would be expected, the screaming starts. Janice asks one model what happened with her makeup. She tells the models that for an audition they need to have a bit of undereye concealer, mascara, and brows. She tells one model to hide the pimples. Janice interviews that she went to give the models a pep talk but all she saw was lots of flaws, eye-boogers, unkempt hair, earwax, and parsley in the teeth. She thought to herself, "What have I been spewing poetry about for the last few weeks?" I guess her previous tirades went something like, "If your diva agent you'd like not to tax/Get your ear to a Q-Tip and remove that wax./Bitches." Janice then stops at Tony Perez and says that a) they need to get him some Dermablend makeup, and b) his hair looks like shit. Janice yells and asks why she has to tell him to do his hair. Tony interviews that three hours ago, when he first got there, his hair looked fine, but waiting around in the humidity has made it all fucked-up looking. It does look pretty bad, I have to say. Janice yells, "What does it say on the door? WHAT DOES IT SAY ON THE DOOR?" The models, kind of scared, say, "The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency." Janice yells that they need to start acting like models. She says that she demands perfection, and why do they make her scream and screech, and don't sass her or you'll get a wire hanger across your pretty, pretty face. She ends by telling Tony to get some Dermablend and to do his God damn hair and then storming off. Tony interviews that he doesn't even know what Dermablend is, and is getting awfully stressed out. He has the lines down pat, but the whole business about the pimples and whatnot is really getting to him, and may cost him the first job that he's had in a month. Oh, Tony! Stop the rumble!

We see some models auditioning. One of these is Grayce Pederson, who tells us that she smiled pretty big. One is also Andrew of the Mohawk from last week. Janice says that she's impressed and that his was the best read of the day. Another is "discovered" Sarah, who Janice loves. And then, poor black Marcus. Fred tells us that Marcus played it up, but it was a little too street. Marcus says that he thinks they liked it, because they asked him to do it again. We see Marcus and the 1-800-DENTIST folks interacting, to hilarious effect. Marcus says that he has a lot of competition, but with his "pearly white" it won't be a problem.

And then, poor Transylvanian Sorin. As you all know, Sorin doesn't speak English so well, also to hilarious effect. Sorry, my ESL friends, but it's true. He tells us that for the others who can read English okay, the commercial might have been easy. Not so for him, because he is from different country. He can't read the words "fearful patients." Sorin doesn't know if he's going to get the job. I think we can all safely say no. Sorry, Sorin.

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Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency

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