When Belko Royce cries, which he does like all the time, I get the most confusing feelings. If I believed in pets or had a pet, I would name it Belko, in the hopes that that would make me love it more. But also that I would believe in dating.
Belko: "Is he here? Can I talk to him!?"
Holder: "I don't know what you mean? But sure."
Belko: "I gotta tell Stan why I shot Darren Richmond. In case he hasn't put that puzzler together yet."
Holder: "Yeah, okay crazy. You can go back to rocking in place if you want."
Terry: "Stan, brother-in-law, please don't blame yourself because Belko killed another person you told him to. And please don't blame yourself for your shitty wife running off. And please don't blame yourself because your kids have finally noticed their horrible mother is missing. And please don't blame yourself for the fact that you let a mental case act as the uncle of your children, and now he's gone off and shot his mother and gone to jail and is right now cracking up even more than usual."
Stan: "Terry, like everyone in this family, I am too busy feeling sorry for myself to feel all that bad about anything else. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go make Belko's situation all about me."
Paparazzi: "Mr. Larsen! Mr, Larsen, do you think your family's shitty attitude about everything might have something to do with your constant bummer bad luck? Mr. Larsen!"
Gwen & Jamie: "Our cyclical detente has reached its apex, as we share watch for the man we both love. I'm so glad his speech was going so great before he got arrested and shot, that was a high point."
Jamie: "Why weren't you at that rally?"
Gwen: "I ate bad shrimp or something. Do you have pets? Any reason for you to go away and let me sit this vigil alone for a sec and figure out all my situations?"
Jamie: "I don't have a cat. I don't believe in pets. Maybe if I named it Belko. But no, I just don't like animals. Or people. Or sex."
Gwen: "I wish I was asexual like you."
Jamie: "Who knows if I am even joking."
Gwen: "Hey, apropos of really nothing, did Darren ever cheat on his wife Lily? Perhaps you have heard of her."
Jamie: "Silence is my only response to how many different ways that's not okay for you to talk about right now."
Gwen, crying: "Jeez. But no, this all makes more sense in retrospect."