High-school Starbucks. I don't know much about this show, but I think this must be a dream sequence, because I see a skeletal creature walking through the room. Oh, wait, my mistake -- it's Marissa. She sits down next to Summer at the coffee bar and asks where Zach is: "I'm not used to seeing you without him." It turns out that Zach "left early to spend Christmas in Cabo with his fam." Is there a law that says that everyone from Orange County is only allowed to vacation in Cabo? Because there's a whole wide world out there they could explore, and they actually seem rich enough to afford the trips. Marissa clues us in that D.J. is in Sacramento visiting his family. Each misses her beau, and both decide that Christmas is going to suck. Marissa suggests that they spike the egg nog. Summer nixes the idea, and Marissa takes it back: "Just kidding. Kind of. Actually, not really." It's funny because she's a teenage alcoholic. Marissa thinks that "last year, the holidays were so much fun." Summer has a slightly different recollection: "I got rejected by Cohen in a Wonder Woman costume, and you got caught shoplifting." They decide that it was memorable.
Seth walks up and wishes Marissa and Summer a Merry Chrismukkah. They are not amused by him. Marissa: "Don't remind us." Summer: "I forgot your festive little holiday." Seth decides that the two of them are taupe on the color-coded holiday alert system. I really wish they would stop trying make Seth even quirkier and instead deal with his raging egomania. Apparently, taupe indicates a "dangerously low level of holiday cheer." I wonder if he has any color that indicates a dangerously high level of holiday rage. Summer and Marissa start to walk away, and they each sarcastically tell Seth how much they are looking forward to their family holidays. He stops them, and "on behalf of Jesus, and Judah Maccabee, and the Cohens," invites them (along with Marissa's father) to the Chrismukkah celebration. They grudgingly accept the invitation, and he tells them that they "went from taupe to putty." So I guess Summer just doesn't care if Zach thinks she's got the hots for Seth, and nobody is concerned that it will be uncomfortable for Jimmy and Julie to spend the holiday together? That's fine, because I don't care about any of those things either.
Julie walks up to Kirsten in the lobby of...that place where they work, and asks Kirsten if she's ready for the investors' meeting. Kirsten was ready, and already attended the meeting, which started two hours earlier. Julie is the worst liar ever: "What? Two hours ago? [frustrated exhalation] My new assistant is constantly putting the wrong numbers into my, my, my Blackberry." Kirsten points out that she tried to reach Julie, and Julie is all wide-eyed and innocent when she claims that her batteries must have died. Of course, her Blackberry chooses that exact moment to start ringing. (That's not a euphemism, but I may have to find a way to turn it into one.) The ring, by the way, is "The Hustle." Kirsten points out that "The Hustle" is Jimmy's favorite song. I have trouble believing that "The Hustle" is anybody's favorite song. I don't even think it was Van McCoy's favorite song, and he wrote the damn thing. Jimmy is just sooooo boring. In any case, Kirsten reminds Julie that Kirsten was with her the day she picked out her ring tones, so Kirsten knows that "The Hustle" was the tone Julie assigned to Jimmy. (In case you're wondering, Kirsten got "Hungry Like the Wolf," which actually seems so much more appropriate to Marissa.) Julie compliments Kirsten on how sharp she is: "You've got a memory like an elephant." Somehow, I'm certain there's an insult hidden in that sentence. Kirsten wonders why Julie isn't answering, and Julie tells her, "It's just Jimmy." Kirsten: "I thought you two were getting along really well?" Julie snaps her head around and gives Kirsten the glare of death: "What makes you say that?" Kirsten points out that just last week, Julie told her that she and Jimmy were getting along really well: "Are you okay, Julie? You look a little frazzled." Julie: "Well, you know, I didn't get a chance to blow my hair out this morning." That's 'cause she was blowing something else out this morning. Ooooh yeah, I went there. Kirsten goes to a much more innocent place as she leaves the room: "I said 'frazzled,' not 'frizzy.'"