Marissa sets Johnny up on a couch. He keeps trying to get rid of her, but she's her usual clueless self. Johnny's mother strolls in, apparently finished with work at 8 in the morning. What the hell job does she have that makes her go on weekend trips, work the night shift, AND not be able to go pick up her son from the hospital? Is she a hooker? And for that matter, why couldn't Johnny have just waited for his mom to get out of work before he was discharged? She obviously only had a few minutes left on her shift anyway. This is stupid. Johnny's mom is thrilled to meet the Marissa Cooper Johnny's told her so much about, indicating to me that Johnny hasn't really told his mother all that much about her. Johnny's mother calls Marissa "gorgeous," and I guess that, after letting Tate Donovan direct the last episode, they've decided to allow Mischa Barton write this week's. Johnny's mom claims to work the night shift at a nursing home, which still doesn't explain what the hell she was doing in San Jose last week, but whatever. Johnny wants Marissa to leave so that she can make it to class on time, but his mother asks her to stay for her announcement that has nothing to do with Marissa whatsoever: she got Johnny an appointment with "the best sports medicine doctor in all of Orange County." Johnny's thrilled -- until Mom tells him that he'll have to wait a few months to see him. He'll miss the surfing tour, which Johnny apparently didn't realize would happen when he found out that he destroyed his knee. "I did the best I could," Mom says pathetically. Good thing they've got Marissa the Selfless Hero around!
Summer plops down next to Seth and says that it turns out that she's "totally smart!" "In your own way," Seth says condescendingly. My Seth love, it cools. "Apparently, I have a lot of what they call 'aptitude,'" Summer continues, undaunted by her boyfriend's jealous asshole behavior. Dr. Kim informed her that, every once in a while, they have a female student who's smart but didn't try very hard because she was more interested in "boys, shopping, and celebrity gossip." And I now officially hate this storyline. Anyway, Dr. Kim thinks that if Summer pulls her grades up, she'll be able to get into Brown, and then she and Seth will be able to go to the same school! "Wouldn't that be awesome?!" Summer cries. "Yeah," Seth says, not at all convincing. And I'm sure Brown won't hold it against Summer that she never bothered to try in school except when she wanted to look good for colleges. Summer says that she's really into going to Brown now that she found out you can make your own major there and they have cute school colors or something. ["Let me guess: one of them is brown?" -- Wing Chun] There's a meeting for prospective students tomorrow. They agree to attend it together, and then sit down to read some of Seth's Kierkegaard, now that they're both smart dorks.