The O.C.
The End Of Innocence

Episode Report Card
Sara M: C+ | Grade It Now!

Ryan and Marissa make out on Marissa's bed. Then Julie knocks on the door and Ryan runs off to a hiding spot, falling on his face in his hurry to get off the bed. It would have been really awesome if Ryan had grabbed a nearby lampshade and thrown it over his head to hide, like they do in cartoons, but instead he just boringly hides behind a curtain. Marissa opens the door, where Julie lectures her that they "don't have locked doors in this house," which must make for some pretty awkward situations when Julie and Jimmy are gettin' bizzy and then Marissa bursts into her mom's room to borrow a shirt. No wonder she's so messed up. Julie tells Marissa that she and Jimmy are getting married on Saturday, after which they'll be going to Hawaii. All of four of them. Forever. Marissa doesn't like this idea. Julie doesn't care. They're all moving to Hawaii and getting fresh starts and clean slates and that's final. Julie leaves the room so that Ryan and Marissa can share a Tragic Star-Crossed Lovers' Stare.

The next morning, Ryan's making custom omelets as Seth suggests that he and Marissa run away together, because that plan always works out. Ryan says he'd like a plan that doesn't involve his getting arrested. Seth says that Ryan can move to Hawaii too, and become a SCUBA instructor or start his own macadamia nut farm. Seth loves macadamia nuts. And Ryan in a wetsuit. It's the perfect plan for Seth, if for no one else. Ryan would rather have Marissa move to the Cohen Casa. "I think the nut farm has a better shot," Seth says. Ryan says that the Cohen house has "plenty of room," which gives it something in common with the space between his ears. Can't anyone on this show come up with a plan that isn't fundamentally ridiculous? Seth doubts that this plan will work, but he gives Ryan some "ammo" for when he presents it to Sandy -- a bagel. Bagels are like kryptonite for Jews, you see. Summer and Marissa hug. Summer says she won't let Marissa leave. Like, she will physically stop Marissa from leaving Newport. Hopefully, this plan will not involve a net, since Marissa could probably squeeze through the holes of a colander without breaking a sweat. Marissa says that Hawaii is a better option than boarding school, and she's kind of excited about the idea of her family being together and staying together and everyone being happy for the first time ever. Even if it means leaving Ryan.

Jimmy and Julie kiss like teenagers. Except for Seth and Summer, whose displays of affection are pretty much limited to Summer's swats at Seth's head. Julie asks Jimmy why he was tense for the last few months, but now he's all relaxed and happy. Jimmy says that he's just excited about his fresh start. These fresh starts are starting to get stale. Julie leaves to meet with the caterer, bumping into the Shady Guy on her way off. He lets himself onto the boat, and Jimmy confidently tells him that this story will have a "happy ending," which means it won't. Jimmy assures the guy that he will have every dime of his money by tomorrow night. Shady Guy says he's rooting for Jimmy and all, but that "this is it." PARENTAL DISCRETION IS ADVISED!

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The O.C.




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