As it turns out, Luke as a way with all the Cooper women, and let's hope we never see how that manifests itself with China. Luke turns up at the Cooper house, and Caitlyn escapes from the closet or wherever they've been keeping her to coo at him. Lady Heather appears in an orange shirt which perfectly matches her orange hair, which is sadly not as flippy as usual. Lady Heather asks what's going on, and Caitlyn clearly wants her to butt out, but Lady Heather just banishes her back into the armoire. When Lady Heather admonishes Luke for coming to the house, he says he thought she needed help with her DSL. Lady Heather responds that, as much as she wants high-speed internet access, it's not worth Caitlyn's becoming suspicious. Jimmy motors up, and Lady Heather hurriedly explains that Luke just came by to "defrag [her] hard drive." And who knew such seemingly innocuous computer talk could be so sexy? Next thing we know, she'll be inviting him to stick his floppy in her disk drive or suggesting that she help increase his bandwidth or announcing that he's checking out her docking station or show her his dongle or finger her users or show him her insertion point or import his data. And then there's the RAM and the RIMM and something about a gopher and come to think of it, are there any computer terms that aren't sexually loaded? Jimmy accepts this excuse for Luke's presence, looking slightly suspicious.
While grilling swordfish, Sandy asks if he should put another piece on for Marissa or Theresa or "any other ladies [Ryan plans] on having over." Hee. Ryan explains that he's just on his way to pick up Theresa, and Sandy amiably throws another fish on the grill. He snoops about how their relationship is going, and Ryan admits that he's trying to figure it out. When Sandy asks if Ryan wants to know his opinion, Ryan asks, "You're gonna tell me either way, right?" Sandy says, "Like my own son." Aw. Aw! He then launches into a not-so-aw-worthy speech about how since Ryan is in high school and Theresa should be, they're both in way over their heads. Theresa has no job! No place to live! Sandy lowers his voice to implore Ryan not to ask if she can stay at The Big House. Ryan says he wouldn't do that, to which Sandy responds, "Good. 'Cause you have no idea what Kirsten did the last time I floated such a concept." But they could just sneak Theresa into the kitchen to fry up some bacon, and Kirsten would be thoroughly charmed. Sandy goes on about Theresa's life and family in Chino, and how running away isn't the answer. Ryan admits that it's crazy, and Sandy rebuts, "It's sweet. It's totally misguided. But, ah, it's kind of charming." And that added up to the most confusing and least helpful advice I've ever heard.