Julie slams Kaitlin's bedroom door shut and asks her why she emailed BULLIT pretending to be her. Kaitlin shrugs and says she was trying to help since she knew her mother didn't "deal well" with long-distance relationships. Julie asks if BULLIT's bank account had anything to do with it, and Kaitlin expertly deflects the question by asking about Julie's mystery man. Julie tells her to stay out of her private life and reminds her that relationships aren't just about money, even though nothing Julie's ever done in her life has supported this statement. We must lead by example, Julie. Kaitlin says she doesn't care about BULLIT because of his bank account. At Julie's withering stare, she admits she does care about the bank account a little. But more importantly, BULLIT loves Julie, is nice, and would be a great step-dad. D'oh! She pulled the needy daughter card. Julie sighs and sits down next to Kaitlin. She says Kaitlin has to tell BULLIT "the truth," which is not going to be fun for anyone except for Dateline NBC when they get to rush Chris Hansen out to tell BULLIT that he's under arrest for getting sexual in emails to an underage girl. Kaitlin says she'll be taking BULLIT with her to Kirsten's stupid party, so Julie will have to make up her mind about his proposal by then. Kaitlin needs to not be in love with her possible future step-dad. It's getting kind of weird. But I guess this is what happens when fathers abandon their children, Jimmy.
Kirsten comes home from her doctor's appointment that we didn't get to see because that would mean seeing Kirsten, which is unacceptable. She sighs and looks sad, of course, then answers a phone call from a desperate Julie, who needs advice about what to say to BULLIT. She says she has a secret lover, and Kirsten will not believe who it is. Kirsten says she'd rather lie down than talk to Julie, because the depression is consuming her. She hangs up on Julie.
Sandy gets off the phone with some guy in a junk yard who has the present Sandy's been looking for for Kirsten. Good thing they did all their business in the middle of the park like that. All the better for Taylor to stalk Ryan. But first, Sandy and Ryan have a man-to-man chat about Ryan's relationship woes. Listening in, of course, is someone in a groundhog mascot uniform, who walks right on into a tree and then whines, in Taylor's voice so there won't be any mistaking who's inside the costume, "stupid tree!" Sandy gets a call and takes off as the groundhog gets closer and closer to Ryan on the park bench. He turns around and startles Taylor, who tries to run but trips over herself in a most embarrassing fashion. I know because I tripped over myself recently in mid-sprint and wiped out spectacularly, skinning my knee and sending dust clouds flying into the air, and a lot of people saw me, and it was not cool. So I feel for Taylor here. The groundhog head flies off, revealing Taylor. She tells Ryan to forget he ever knew her, grabs the head, and run/waddles away. Why does Ryan put up with this?