The O.C.
The Heartbreak

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Bangs And Banging

We open this week's episode in the kitchen of the Big House, where Sandy emerges from the refrigerator to be shot from behind by a giant, streamer-bedecked arrow. Kirsten wields the bow; she enthuses over Valentine's Day, and says that Sandy has just been shot by Cupid. I haven't seen Kirsten this excited since there was bacon. Sandy is not amused as he points out that Valentine's Day is the next day. Kirsten can't believe he's not excited, but Sandy's still thinking about what could have happened with Oliver and the gun. Kirsten narrates that nothing bad happened, and that since Dr. Kim lifted Ryan's suspension, the best thing for everyone involved is a return to normal. That means celebrating the holidays! Sandy scoffs at Valentine's Day: "Rosh Hashanah? That's a holiday. Memorial Day? Yes! A holiday!" He asks if Kirsten knows who invented Valentine's Day, and she defensively responds, "St. Valentine." Sandy holds with the more standard "Hershey's and Hallmark." He complains that the holiday makes single people depressed, and forces couples to pay for chocolate, flowers, and lingerie. When Kirsten points out that Sandy never bought her lingerie, he's all, "And see how upset you are?"

Sandy yelps, "I hate this holiday!," just as Seth enters the kitchen; Seth concludes, "Dad must be talking about Valentine's Day." As Seth reaches into the cupboard for a glass, Kirsten shoots him in the back with another arrow. Aw, Kirsten makes cute, squinched-up faces when she shoots. Seth flatly responds, "Hey. You got me." When Kirsten goes on with the whole "Cupid's arrow" thing again, Seth suggests that she's going overboard. She responds that he's one to talk, given Chrismukkah, and Sandy joins in to argue that at least that's a real holiday. Seth corrects that it's technically two holidays. Hee. They all commence talking at once as people are prone to do on television shows but not so much in real life because real people realize no one's listening and it's futile. As Kirsten is going on about how Seth made Chrismukkah up when he was six, while Sandy is talking about how Chrismukkah is the most important holiday on the Judeo-Christian calendar. Huh? Their chaotic conversation comes to a screeching halt (albeit without the bizarre accompanying sound effects) as Ryan enters the kitchen. Sandy kindly asks how he's doing, and Ryan says he guesses he's fine. Kirsten chirps that he's about to be great, because tomorrow is the big Valentine's Day Singles Gala -- a benefit for the local hospital's cardiac department, with a big party. If that's how Kirsten's trying to sell it, she hasn't learned very much at all about Ryan in the past six months he's lived with them. As Kirsten attempts to rally their enthusiasm with wild gestures, the men just stare at her blankly. She resignedly tells them, "I'm gonna go."

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The O.C.

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