The O.C.
The Last Waltz

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The Vast Schmaltz

7 'n 7 is back! She calls Kirsten and lies that she's staring at the lake right now and wishing her "friend" were there, too. 7 'n 7 is the person who sent Kirsten those flowers, just in case you thought it was Sandy or Dennis or something, and she says she'll be in the area tomorrow and was hoping they could meet up for lunch at the Yacht Club. Kirsten agrees to this, and they hang up. As the Music of Evil plays, the man who delivered those flowers to Kirsten comes out of the seedy motel bathroom and says that Kirsten had better "come through with the money."

Summer has finally arrived at school, whereupon Taylor runs up and tells her that she heard Dean Evil telling Dr. Kim (we won't be seeing her, though. That would violate this show's strict one-Asian-per-episode rule) that he was going to suspend Seth if he didn't tell him who helped him steal the tiki hut by the end of the day. They're lucky they don't live in Texas. I hear you can get the death penalty for tiki hut-related crimes there. Summer totally falls for this line, and then Seth walks up and asks them what's wrong. Summer lies that Taylor caught some teacher on a pedophile website, because loudly and falsely accusing your teachers of pedophilia is a great way to get sued. Trust me, I know. Taylor takes off, and Seth wonders what Taylor was doing on that pedophile website in the first place. Probably looking for a boyfriend, as we'll soon find out.

Kirsten's culinary efforts have extended to include quiche, which she is making for her and Sandy's lunch. Sandy's pleased with that, but not with the Newport Group, which has really suffered from Caleb's financial woes. They've got six weeks before they have to default on their loans, but Sandy says there's still time to save the company if Kirsten wants to sell off some assets and work really hard. The other option is to just sell the company off and wash her hands of it. Sandy says he'll support either decision Kirsten makes, because he's perfect like that. Kirsten says, "It's time to let it go." Also going is that quiche, which has probably burned to a crisp by now.

Summer enters Dean Evil's office and confesses to helping Seth steal the tiki hut. In fact, she actually did all the heavy lifting because "noodle-arms" couldn't. Seth and Summer are totally in luv 4eva! Dean Evil says that Summer's record is now darkened with the stain of prop purloining, and he really can't let her stay on as Social Chair. Oh, please. I got suspended from school for a week, and I still got to stay in the honor society. But then, I did go to public school, where the guitars have distortion and the minorities don't have lines. Summer catches on that her replacement will most likely be Taylor Townsend, and Dean Evil evilly says he'll take Summer's recommendation under consideration.

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The O.C.

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