Lesbian kiss, anyone? Oh, very well! Marissa walks into the Haaaaaaaate Shop and finds Alex, as per usual, as its only employee. Marissa recaps her horrible mom dinner (didn't seem that bad to me), but says that it was all right because she knew she could go there after and see Alex. "Not that I want to put any pressure on you. It's just how I feel." It's not. It's totally not how you feel at all. Alex asks spontaneously, "Are you in the mood for the beach? It's almost time." Time for what? "For the tide to change." Geddit? DO YA? Alex says that this is "a little ritual" she has for when something major is about to happen in her life. Marissa reminds Alex that she said there was no dating on Valentine's Day, and Alex exclaims, "Screw it." She is such a tough girl.
Kirsten sits alone again, staring into the void of her crumbling marriage. Sandy walks down the hallway toward to bedroom, and she looks right at him, standing up, walking, walking, walking. She closes the door in his face. Finally.
Seth and Ryan walk down the pier, Seth noticing the people around them and calling them "normal, non-traumatized people." He asks Ryan, "Think we're ever have that?" Ryan responds, "No." That's right. Those are people are all the rest of us. And we can't possibly understand Seth Cohen's pain.
I love how this supposed "sweeps stunt" has been in the offing for, quite literally, months now, and yet there's literally no spin on it at all. They don't kiss and then get spotted by a passing Seth and Ryan. They don't kiss and then get whisked off by the tide. They don't kiss and then get eaten by a giant bear. They just sit at the water and look out. Out of nowhere, Alex notes, "Tide just turned." Thanks, Magellan. How did she know that? Anyway, it's a good line. I would try it, but I live kind of far from the beach. I'd have to, like, get on a highway. It would all be very unromantic. Just like this wildly awkward kiss. I'm so glad this episode is [WORD THE RHYMES WITH "CLOVER"].