The O.C.
The Model Home

Episode Report Card
Joanna: B- | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Burnin' Down the House

This week we get credits, which are set to Phantom Planet's "California," and are not particularly distinctive, except that they show a white dress-wearing, bouquet-laden Marissa coming down an aisle on the arm of her father, suggesting that she's getting married or coming out in the near future. "Coming out" in the debutante sense, so don't get all excited, all you Marissa/Summer shippers. There's also not nearly enough Adam Brody. Tinkle, tinkle, tink.

We're in the pool house at night, and here's one more reason to love Seth: wouldn't any other teenager object if some new kid came into his house and got to live in the fabulous pool house while he was stuck in a normal bedroom in the Big House? In any case, Ryan can't sleep and instead rolls around the bed in his wifebeater and stylish boxer briefs. He then gets up and puts on his pants. Aw. Pants. He dons the rest of his thug-wear, and heads out the door, where Seth is just approaching. Seth proposes "a little Playstation, perhaps," and then sees Ryan's bag and deduces that he's running away. Ryan sternly commands Seth back into the house, but Seth is off and running with the "what if"s about Child Services and Sandy. Ryan silently listens before turning away. Seth knows that his argument is going nowhere, so instead he decides that he wants to go with Ryan. Yay! Seth explains that besides sailing to Tahiti, he's always wanted to do "that Kerouac thing" -- hitting the road and stopping at diners to "do the pancake tour of North America." Ryan flatly rejects this proposal, which Seth agrees is "fair enough," before questioning what Ryan will do. Ryan doesn't have a plan, but he knows it will involve a new town, a job, and saving money. Seth sarcastically says that it sounds like a "great idea," and Ryan plaintively asks whether he can think of something better. Seth can!

Back in Seth's bedroom, Seth has put on a black zip-front turtleneck sweater, and is madly shoving stuff into a backpack. Sandy knocks at the door, causing Seth quickly to jump into bed, turn off the light, and hide under the covers. Sandy wants to talk, and Seth cutely acts confused, pretending he thinks it's morning. Sandy's voice breaks in disbelief as he asks, "You're asleep?" Seth asks what's going on, and Sandy says he wants to talk about Ryan. Seth rushes to say it's cool and that they don't need to discuss it further, but Sandy thinks they do need to discuss it, since he knows Seth is upset, and he and Kirsten are both upset too. He explains that their responsibility is to their family, and if that were the truth, wouldn't we all just go around stealing and lying and treating people badly all in the name of our families? Only if our last name is "Camden," obviously. Seth responds, "Yeah, it's okay, no, I get it. I mean, this is a person's life we're talking about, and we need to leave it in the hands of the authorities." Throughout this conversation, Seth is completely under the covers, and only his cute little head peeks out. If I were Sandy, I would suspect I had just interrupted Seth in the throes of a little one-on-one action, and make a hasty exit. But then again, if I were stalker Sandy, I'd be gleefully overjoyed to have interrupted another of my son's private moments. Sandy lectures Seth for his sarcasm, causing Seth to argue that he's not employing that particular linguistic tool at the moment. Sandy points out that it's "hard to tell, sometimes." Seth again insists that the situation is all good, agreeing that when he needs to talk about it, he'll let his father know. He rolls over and feigns instant sleep, so a perplexed Sandy finally gets the hint and leaves. Seth pops right back out of bed.

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The O.C.

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