Meanwhile, at the Non-Beautiful Blue Bachelor Pad, Marissa mopes on the couch with the remote. From the television, we hear, "Previously on The Valley," and some dialogue in which someone yells at someone not to hurt someone else. Jimmy enters with takeout of their very own and asks what she's doing; he thought she'd be with Ryan? When she reveals that Ryan is busy with his "friend" Theresa, Jimmy asks whether she's okay with that. She says it's not a big deal, but Jimmy insists that it is, because it's important to her. What's important to her, she says, is not talking about it, because she really is fine and it's "just...high school." He says that's supposed to be his line, and that she's supposed to be talking about how Ryan's the most important thing in the world and she can't live without him and blah. And thank God we don't have to endure Mischa Barton attempting to deliver those lines. In any case, Marissa insists that they're just friends, or trying to be. At the risk of embarrassing her, Jimmy says, she and Ryan were never friends; she snits that she's heard. She asks what her options are if they can't be friends, and he says she needs to let Ryan know what she wants to be. Let's hope it's not an actress.
Back at The Big House, we join the meal just as Theresa is detailing a time when they were all dressed up for her brother's sixteenth birthday. Ryan cuts her off to ask if she has any stories that don't involve him falling down or getting injured. Seth eagerly asks if Ryan fell down when he did musicals, and a gleeful Sandy pipes up, "You did musicals? I did a musical or two myself in college!" Kirsten whines that someone should stop him before he starts singing "Greased Lightnin'," but Seth encourages him: "Do it, Dad. Travolta's your bitch." Sandy thanks his son, but, sadly, does not jump on the table and pretend it's a car or a woman or whatever that song's really about. Theresa continues her story, which takes place in the revolving restaurant of a Holiday Inn, but she's interrupted again, this time by the doorbell. Everyone looks anxious, for some reason, as well they should since it turns out to be Marissa, who Kirsten calls "sweetie." She hopefully asks if Ryan is home, then follows Kirsten into the dining room just as Seth professes his love for revolving restaurants and Sandy is all, "Who doesn't? Motion and digestion? Unbeatable combination!" Kirsten makes with the awkward "Look who's here!" and Sandy's head looks like it's about to unscrew from all the looking back and forth and back and forth. He zestfully asks if everyone knows each other, and they sure do! When Sandy asks if she's hungry, Marissa announces that she's starving; is it okay if she joins them? Ryan rushes to get her a place; she sits and asks, "So. What's everyone talking about?" Dead silence ensues.









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